Freedom!

Yesterday gail and steve came to visit. Gail said TJ and i could have an outing and she and steve would watch Jaely. I, of course, was anxious for an outing. We wanted to go see Baby Mama, but the showing didn't work with our schedule of feedings, so we went to target, circuit city and Traverse Pie company. It was nice, but i must admit i wanted to call and check on jaely a ton. It was relaxing not to take the stroller in and out and not to worry if her binky would fall out of her mouth during the car ride. It was wonderful just to hang out with family. As soon as gail got to our house she scooped jaely right up. Jaelynne was extremely fussy during the night TJ had to fall asleep with her on his chest. She wanted nothing to do with laying down, especially in her crib. I think it was gas. Tomorrow grandpa jer comes.

Gail also made us an awesome pot roast and a delicious cake (Jaely turned a month old). I just ate the leftovers. Yum.

It is still so strange for it to be Sunday and for me not to be busy correcting papers. Rather i am busy taking care of jaely and doing our laundry. Next i can either take a shower or a nap before her next feeding. Hummmm decisions, decisions.

Greek Salad Anyone?

Yesterday my aunt, uncle, and brother stopped at Panera bread on their way to visit. I kindly requested soup and a greek salad. I love feta cheese. I poured my dressing on and was mixing it around when i spotted something that didn't look right. At closer inspection (moving aside a big hunk of lettuce) there was a dead, hairy, big moth laying on my lettuce. Panera has let me down. I spent last summer there writing my thesis, eating and drinking. TJ and i love that place. It has let me down. Nasty! My aunt decided not to eat her greek salad.

Visitors!

Yesterday, instead of going to my breastfeeding class, i hung out with friends. One friend just had a baby a week after Jaely was born and the other friend already has two kids. It was so nice to get out, sit outside in the beautiful weather and talk about babies, school, and life. Jaely was awake for most of the outing.

Today was wonderful. My aunt carol, uncle mike and my brother jered came over to visit me and jaely. . . I think primarily Jaely. She was fussier than normal, but i don't think they minded. It really makes me sad that family is not close by to see Jaely more, but i am so thankful people are making the effort to see her. My other brother and his wife are coming to stay in June. I am super excited.

On Saturday gail and steve are coming and then on monday my dad is coming. I love my family.

Right now Jaely is wearing an adorable dress. It is so cute. Of course, after family leaves, she becomes content and plays on her blanket. I wish they had gotten to see it. She is alert and not crying, but kicking, tooting, and looking everywhere.

Yikes!

Yesterday evening, while Jaely was sleeping, we met with two guys about the land behind our house that is for sale. I want that land so bad for a couple of reasons. I don't want anyone building back there, it seems like a good investment, and it would be nice to have two acres as opposed to one. However, they would not budge on their price last night. Or at least they didn't pick up on the fact that we want to negotiate when i said the price is too high. 28,900 is a ton of money. Of course, one guy figured out our monthly budget and he said we should easily be able to make payments of 137.00 a month. I said that we could, but it is the balloon payment at the end that we are worried about. Then i told him that i will not be working next year. He punched the numbers and said "yikes, that would be very tight. Maybe you should work." We knew that we would have to sacrifice some things for me to stay home with Jaely next year. It is just hard to pass up such a good opportunity. But if they won't come down at all on the price, we are going to have to pass it up. We don't want to stretch ourselves and cause extra stress.

Weird day

My day has consisted of sleeping and nursing. I am so sick. . . i never knew my body could produce so much mucus. My head feels all cloudy, my throat hurts, and my head is pounding. I really have slept most of the day, waking to feed Jaely, change her diaper, and put her back down. I haven't changed out of my pajamas in two days. Poor Jaely. I have had to stop mid feeding to blow my nose, and she really doesn't like me sneezing when she is latched on. Hopefully, tomorrow i will wake up and feel completely better. . . hopefully. Sorry for all the whining!

Food

It all started with dad and his shrimp casserole. Then. . .
Jered and his Thai curry chicken
Charity and Party chicken
Corrie and chicken pot pie
Sarah, nate, and corbin with pizza hut
Rob, Kim, Noah, and ryan with lee's chicken (i am eating leftovers as i type!)
Tonight. . . The Bailey's are providing dinner.

TJ and i cannot believe how much it helps to not have to worry about meals. . . and we both love leftovers, so lunches are basically taken care of too. Thanks everyone!

The cards are pouring in. The gifts are still coming. Visitors are sharing their love with Jaely as they hold and cuddle her. Life is good. We are blessed beyond belief.

Beautiful Day

I am currently typing on TJ's laptop. . .my mac went crazy when TJ was connecting our video camera up to it. My beloved mac. This morning, i took Jaely in her stroller outside and raked and weeded our side garden and our massive back garden. It felt so good to be outside, to get fresh air and to get something accomplished. She basically slept the entire time. I bundled her up and made sure she was out of direct sunlight. We had a great day together. TJ got the fallen tree almost all cleaned up. We are both sleep deprived. I probably should be sleeping right now, instead of blogging. I just put Jaelynne down in her swing. I held her for a long time while she slept, but decided i should probably do something with my time. . . other than stare at my beautiful daughter. Don't get me wrong, i did stare for a considerable amount of time. . . so long in fact that she has sleep marks on her cute little cheeks. I need to write more thank you notes. They are never ending because the love and thoughtfulness of our friends and family doesn't end. It is wonderful! TJ had to make a trip to meijers early this morning because we found out the hard way that huggies diapers are slightly larger than pampers diapers. The "slightly" matters a lot when you are only 6 pounds 14 ounces. Explosions of nastiness can occur. We will have to save the huggies for when she is a little bit bigger. You can tell my level of sleepiness by how often and quickly i change subjects. I also laugh at the dumbest things. . . laughs so hard i have tears streaming down my face. Life is crazy, but oh so good!

Normal

Life is starting to feel normal again. . . like we have always had jaelynne. We are still learning, but we are definitely settling in. We even went for a walk today and we are making sure that we don't become hermits by going to meijers and target and such. TJ is overwhelmed with going back to work, finishing the built-in, and preparing the yard for spring. The tree that fell on our cars has left behind a big stump and plenty of sticks. Gail suggested we invite every child we know and have a big stick gathering party. Sounds fun! Right now Jaely is in her swing. Friends are bringing over pizza and TJ is reading the paper. I am so thankful that last night Jaely nursed at 2 and 6, no 4. I got a little more sleep last night than the night before. And i got a nap in, too. It took me all morning to write a thank-you note to our builder. He sent the nicest cookies that came in an adorable "It's a Girl" tin that plays music when you open it up. They are the best cookies i think i have ever had. I need to remember the company when i went to send a little something to someone. Of course, we are wondering if he is just buttering us up before we meet about that land contract, but i think he is genuinely a nice guy. . . he did after all give us our first christmas in our new home ornament and passes to the home show every year. Anyway, it took awhile to write him a thank you note between nursing, sleeping, and taking care of some phone calls. Thankfully, i was able to get more thank you notes done in the afternoon. Well, i better go and try to get things accomplished. I can't post without pictures. . .

Me and Jaely

My poor cat

I know, two posts in one day. . . crazy

So, i got home today and was walking to the back of the house when i heard constant meowing. Ugly was on our bed sleeping, so i decided it must be the other cat. The meow seemed to be coming from the guest room. . . only behind closed doors. Just recently, i started closing the door because i washed the blanket and Ugly (aka drooly) likes to sleep on the blanket and drool. I wanted it fresh and clean for our baby guests. I opened the door and there was Abby, the cute and proper cat. I felt terrible. Guilt overcame me. She came right to me wanting pets. I thought for sure she would give me the cold shoulder, but she just wanted some loving. After some major pets, i inspected the room. Abby is so proper. She cannot stand a mess, and thankfully she didn't want to go where she would cause a mess. After much sniffing and looking, i congratulated her for her properness, in spite of the situation. About 10 minutes later she did make her way downstairs to use her bathroom. Poor cat. I can tell she did sleep on the blanket. . . not because of drool, but because of cat hair. And it WAS so clean.

I then sat and looked at my lunch box and school bag. Where will i put my beautiful vera school bag? Do i clean it out of all of the paper clips, markers, pens, sticky notes, etc, or do i just put it away for a year and some months? It was weird to leave today. My last days normally consist of crazy kids, cleaning up the room, packing things away, cleaning out lockers. Not just walking away after i locked the door. Strange.

Strange

It is so weird. I just packed my lunch for the last time. After years of packing a lunch day after day, today is the last day for a long time. I made sure it was a good one . . . mashed potatoes and yogurt and a banana. Yum. Last night i corrected papers for the last time for a long time. Things are definitely going to be different, but so good. I am so excited about this new journey. I wake up wondering if today will be the day that our life will change. I still have a feeling she will be late, but she has surprised us once before. When we found out we were pregnant with her, i was certain we weren't pregnant because i thought i got my period. Turned out to just be spotting and that was the beginning of her life. She gave us the best surprise ever. Maybe that is her plan again. Maybe she is just so comfy and snuggly that she is content to stay in there. Any way, we will meet her soon. After 9 months and years of waiting, what is another week, really?!

Well, i am on my way to work. No reason to get there super early. . . i am ready for a sub at any time. Our phones are charged. Gas is in both cars. The car seat is ready. My bags are in the car. We have our phone list. We are ready for you Gertie!!!

Sunny Days

I love the sunshine. I love how we don't have to turn one light on in our home when it is sunny. It just pours in. The cats find the sunniest spot and nap for awhile as each and every whisker and long hair is illuminated. Much better than yesterday's snow. Today, i am going to clean. . . again. And do laundry. I just don't want to sit around all day. TJ has grades due soon, so the built-in is put on hold. Since there is really no chance for the dresser being finished before Gertie and visitors come and check out her room, there isn't as much pressure. I keep telling myself that she has everything she needs, it is me that wants EVERYTHING ready. She doesn't need a window seat. I just want the storage and a place to put all the pillows i made. It makes no difference to her. A changing table would be nice, but almost any surface, including the floor will work.

We got an awesome gift in the mail. It is an exersaucer. Only we searched the box, and we have no idea who it came from. Anyone going to claim it, so they can get a proper thank you note and we can tell Gertie when she gets older who it is from?

Right now the cats are smooshed together in the brightest ray of sunshine pouring through our front door. They look so content.

What to do, what to do?

Keven Wright, the guy that built our house called us today to let us know that the subdivision that was being built behind us isn't working out. In fact, he was telling us that we could buy the land directly behind us. He found this out through the developer (which he has purchased some land from) and wanted the people that bought his homes to know that this was an option for them. Right now for 0$ down we could get a 5 year balloon at 3.5% at about $135.00 a month. The land is going for about $28,000. In a week, the land will be advertised to the rest of the public and the interest rate will be at %7.5 through a bank. Anyone could buy it and build whatever kind of house they would like. The property already has a gas line and a paved road access. If we bought it, that would mean we would add about an acre onto our current acre and guarantee that no one would build behind us. He also said that the referral rate for his two houses that are for sale in the sub have doubled. . . now they are $1000.00 a piece. Anyone looking for a house!?? Homeowners of a house he built in the sub were so excited. They bought both lots on either side of them. Instead of having neighbors, they got much more land.

We have some questions and a lot to think about. Obviously this is huge, since we are cutting our income in half. . . hmmmmm.

She's Back. . .

I just drove my car home from the shop. After paying three car payments on it, driving without heated seats, knowing TJ is driving the scary truck, and missing my ipod plug in, i am so so so glad to drive it home today.

Life has been crazy busy since i last wrote. I have been working 12 hour days, coming home and trying to get ready for Gertie. In fact, life since last friday as been nonstop (except for my two totally relaxing baths that i took).
We went out of town for a my last shower last weekend. It was absolutely fabulous to see my cousins, aunts and uncle.


Then, instead of staying at gail's and getting up real early on Sunday to finish up getting things we needed for Gertie in Grand Rapids, TJ surprised me with a one night stay at the

Marriot on the river in G.R. That way we could sleep in. But, the best part was that it had a huge tub (big enough for a pregnant big girl). I took a bath at night and a bath in the morning before we left. He also got a king sized bed with extra pillows, so i could prop myself up. He liked the big screen TV. It was a wonderful end to a great weekend. Then after sleeping in and taking a bath, we headed to Babies R Us to get the remaining things that we needed. We have to go back and get the glider that we bought because it wouldn't fit in the intrigue. . . we needed the vue, of course.

The rest of the week was full of report cards, parent teacher conferences, meetings, planning and correcting papers. I lived at school this week. It was actually pretty disgusting. . . but only six more days of being there.

Tomorrow, i plan on cleaning. I hope i have the energy. We do want to go pick up the glider. . . that might suck all the energy out of me though. I am tired.

I just got home. . .

For a friday, getting home at 7 is super late for me, especially when i didn't do my normal sleep an hour later on Fridays until 6:15. Instead, i woke up at my normal monday thru thursday time of 5:15. I just have so much to do. Report cards are due monday and parent teacher conferences are tuesday. Plus, because i was getting ready for all that, i am not really planned for next week. Before i could work on report cards i had to grade two big projects. Yikes! I am tired. We are going out of town this weekend for my last shower. I was planning on doing laundry tonight so i wouldn't have to when we got back sunday afternoon, but i just don't think i have it in me. I am looking forward to the shower tomorrow and seeing family that i haven't seen in ages. Of course, my mom will be greatly missed and thought of often. . . The shower for a friend that i went to yesterday was a painful reminder of what my mom would have been like. Her mom was so excited and sat next to her while she opened presents. It was neat to see.

The girl that is due four days after me was told by her doctor to stop working. The girl that is due 6 days after me is dilated to a 1. Ang, who is due 10 days after me, was having some pretty painful contractions the other night. These are reminders that we are indeed close!

I am absolutely exhausted. . .

but i had to put her things on her shelves. I am sure i will move things around a hundred times, but for tonight, it is good. I feel a little more peaceful now that i got some of the bins of stuff emptied and put away. I know the post from a week ago on baby Ellis blog looked done, but they were missing a piece and not secured to the wall. We went to a birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's tonight. When we got back, tj headed to the garage and i headed to the nursery. This weekend is full. We have our birthing class from 9-4 tomorrow and then sunday 1-4. That doesn't leave a whole lot of time for the built-in, laundry, cleaning, or school work.

Baby on the Brain

School work just seems so pointless. TJ and i both have baby on the brain big time, which is fun, but it can also interfere with your sleep. I NEVER have had a problem sleeping before. . . TJ is a different story. So, when i was awake last night from 2-4, i didn't really know what to do with myself. Now it seems i would not have a problem sleeping to take a nap, but i am not letting myself. I need a good night's sleep.

Instead of doing more school work, I started to put the swing together that Gertie got at the shower today. It is adorable. I cannot wait to see her in it. The shower was so nice. It was refreshing to hang out with those friends again. I missed them, so it was good to catch up and chat and of course eat yummy food. Besides the swing, we got adorable classic pooh outfits, board books, a summer time outfit, a cute rabbit, a Dedicated to God Precious Moments, boob cream, and a soft sweatshirt. It is amazing to us how such a little person can have so much stuff. Our guest room is almost filled with things, but the car seat and extra base won't stay in there. The pack and play is in there too, along with our diaper champ and high chair.

Well, i have papers that must be corrected for tomorrow, so i guess i better go.

Attack of Pasta Roni

Mmmm. . . pasta roni, the San Fransisco treat. TJ is on his way home, so i decided to make myself the gourmet dinner of pasta roni,-angel hair with herbs to be exact. I was eager to see how my students did on their multiplication and division assessment, so i was correcting those and entering the grades in my gradebook (i know, on a Friday. . . i am crazy). When my pasta was done, i brought over a bowl and placed it on my gradebook, taking bites as i worked. I had a mouthful, chewed, just getting ready to swallow, when i had a sudden, forceful, unavoidable urge to cough. I spewed all the chewed up pasta and spit onto my gradebook and projected it on the table and in my box of markers, pens, and paper clips. GROSS. Because it was so liquidy, my grades written in marker instantly began to bleed through to other pages and smear. YUCK! I am thankful for two things. . . 1: i did not cough out my food on my electronic, web based gradebook on my mac and 2: that tj and i both have cell phones so i could call him with my story. I knew he would appreciate it. Life is funny. Today was sunny. Alanis Morissette's Simple Together is blaring on my ipod. 16 students out of 23 students got an "A" or a "B" on the assessment. My one boy that got a 1/10 on the assessment is getting tested for special ed, thank goodness. Today is Friday. Sunday there is a shower for baby ellis. TJ is coming home. Life is good.

Attempting to Wind Down

Last night, i got very little sleep. Once i got to sleep i was fine, but it was getting their that took so long. Tonight, i fear will be a repeat of last night. Maybe it is because TJ is out of town. It could be because Gertie's arrival is upon us soon. Whatever it is i need sleep.

Today, i felt more pregnant than ever. Just typing that brings a smile to my face. I feel like my strut has turned into a waddle, and my leg muscles have each turned into a ball shaped mass. Is it wrong to smile at stretch marks? I love my belly. It is really starting to lead the way through the hallways and part the sea of students. Thank goodness my belly button has not betrayed me. Maybe it never will! Her body parts are really protruding now. . . it makes me giggle. I am reminded that i really have no torso. . . i go from hips to ribs. I actually could feel my hips hit my rib cage before i was pregnant. Poor Gerite. . . not a lot of floating room for her. Whenever i picture her in me, i picture her clothed. I need to write that in her baby book. I just realized that that is pretty bizarre.

The end of the trimester is coming up, which means assessments, report cards, and conferences. Conferences are March 11. I hope i am not too miserable by then. I am glad this was a very short week. I don't know if i could have made a five day one.

Well, i should go to the couch and try another attempt at winding down because this is not helping.

An Extension of Mid-winter Break!

Today, both TJ and i are home because of another snow day. We got a ton of snow. . . i will try to post a picture later of our back deck, but it doesn't always show it properly. We are still under a lake effect warning until later this afternoon. i am still trying to get over my cold/cough. Another day off will help greatly. I think i am going to work on my sub letter for my leave, continue to clean from this weekend (i couldn't really cross it off my list because i didn't finish), and relax. I cannot believe that i have had a snow day a week for the last five or six weeks. With all of our snow days and our six days of pool school, i am really behind with the curriculum. Oh well. Tomorrow, after my doctor's appointment, TJ is going to Traverse City for a couple of days. He is driving the S10. . .i am not happy about it. Well, i guess it is time to start my day. :)

Mid winter break

This cold is knocking me on my butt. I tried to be patient, but my cough is making me go nutty. I have had a cough for three weeks now, and i am currently getting really stuffy. I think i am getting another cold, while still holding onto the cough of my last cold.

But that is the only pesky thing going on right now. My cold forced me to take it easy today, so i sat and finished up the remaining thank you notes i had from my shower last week. TJ and i had a date at 2 Tony's in spring lake. They have the best food. Right now, TJ is painting the second coat of blue in the nursery. It is the perfect blue. I am eating cottage cheese and chunky applesauce all mixed together. I just can't get enough of apples lately.

I have quite the lengthy to do list for this weekend, but when i woke up this morning and realized it was only Friday, it was the best feeling. I slept 13 hours yesterday. I was so tired from the all day field trip, i just crashed when i got home. It felt great to get that much sleep. I probably will tonight as well.

Mom

I cannot believe that today marks five years since my mom has passed away. It seems a lot longer since i have felt her hug, listened to her words, and heard her laugh, yet it seems as painful as a fresh wound. I think being pregnant has made that a bit more strong. My mom loved moose. A few years ago as gail was shopping at kohl's, she ran into a cuddly moose stuffed animal. She bought it and stored it away, waiting for a baby ellis. At my shower on Saturday, gail stood up and spoke before gift opening time. She said the nicest things about my mom. I was crying, smiling, and aching as she spoke. She was saying that if my mom had been at the shower she would be dressed in pink, laughing and being rather loud and excited. She went on to say that her and my mom were becoming friends as they got to know each other, especially after working a garage sale together. She touchingly said that she often sees pieces of my mom in me, and that Gertie too will have pieces of my mom in her. It was so good to hear that my mom will not be forgotten because i remind people of her when i do certain things and say certain words. Gail presented the moose to me and he sat on the table next to me as i opened gifts. I looked at him often and smiled, knowing my mom was there with us celebrating the life of her first grandchild and relishing in the fact that there were so many pink outfits that i was opening. It pains me to think of what my mom and Gertie will be missing out on by not meeting each other, but it brings me some peace to know that Gertie will see what her grandma was like. I am also so thankful for grandma gail. Gertie is a lucky girl.

I have a snow day. . . tomorrow!

I just got the best call. . . i have yet another snow day tomorrow. I can't believe it was cancelled the night before. . . well actually i can when i think of the treacherous ride home we had.

It took us 6 1/2 hours to make a three hour trip. We were making pretty good time until we reached grand rapids. They had closed 96 due to a fifty car pile-up. We were forced to take back country roads where the wind whipped the dry snow across all the fields. It was absolutely terrible. I m so glad tj is a good and cautious driver and that we were kept safe from other drivers.

Yesterday was a truly wonderful day. I get emotional just writing about it. I met and saw people that i hardly speak to, but they have been praying for us for years. They all came together to celebrate Gertie. I am continually amazed at the people that God has put in our lives. . . so much support and love. My aunt, Mom-in-law- and friend/sister-in-law threw an amazing shower. The food was awesome, the company was the best (not awkward at all in spite of not knowing some people very well), the gifts were overwhelming, the games were fun, and the enthusiasm was very evident.

I washed the mattress pad, put it on our crib mattress, and put the fitted sheet i made for Gertie on the mattress. TJ and i put it in the crib and put the bumpers on. I almost started crying. I am so eager to meet her, i can hardly stand it!!

As i type this, i am praying that TJ gets a day off too. He is coming down with a cold, tired from the crazy drive and busy weekend. It is unlikely, but you never know. My school closing still hasn't hit the TV, and i have known for half an hour. . . it makes me wonder how many other schools are closed in our county.

Another Snow Day!

I had no idea there was even a chance that i would not be running around teaching 26 students today. I knew that we got over a foot of snow (especially where my school is located), but i thought they would have it under control by the time school started. Both TJ and i were pleasantly surprised to have a snow day. I was praying TJ would get one after i found out i had one because he was out late shoveling, up late working and then woke up at 4:20 to finish some work. Because of the snow day we both got to sleep in.

Today, we are getting the nursery ready to paint. We are not doing the 2x2 squares yet. We are doing the color of the rest of the room. . . Bippity Boppity Blue. Yes, we are having a girl, but i wanted a background that wouldn't draw too much attention and one that would blend in with the mini mural above the changing table. I also plan on doing a bumble bee and such, so blue works. The crib wall will have 2x2 blocks of pink, purple, blue, green, and pooh yellow. This was planned as gebder neutral as possible, so that it could possibly be used for baby number two. The accessories will say "girl"

Tomorrow, we are going out of town for shower number two. I am so excited. Yesterday, when i pulled in (well, i should say when i got stuck in the driveway) i noticed a big graco box. I later found out that our brother-in-law's step mom got us our beautiful wooden highchair. I was shocked and excited! It will be nice to see everyone at the shower. TJ's grandma is going to be there. She had surgery to remove a cancer spot in January, and has recovered nicely. It will be wonderful to see her. It is so much fun to celebrate life. We are also celebrating TJ's and Lori's birthday. What a fun weekend of celebrating.

Random Happenings

I have a cold, so i promised myself that i would take it easy today. Lay around. Read Baby Laughs and Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. Finish thank you notes. Sleep. Maybe watch a movie. I want to be healthy for the Super Bowl get together tomorrow.

Yesterday, one of my lovable students brought me three hand knitted hats that she made for the baby. They are absolutely adorable. I showed them off all day.

i just made a much needed hair cut appointment and a pedicure appointment for Tuesday. My hair is so long, frizzy, and thick. I haven't had a spa pedicure since i got married. TJ paints my toe nails, but he is a little busy and at the salon i will get so pampered. I cannot wait.

TJ took yesterday off and worked on the built-in. He is getting pretty far. Today, he hopes to start the scary part of finishing the shelves. He just needs to cut the plywood for the back. He also has to take it apart and put it back together again. I think he said something about sanding it one last time before he finishes it too. He thinks he might have to redo the top of the window seat. . . he says that his inexperience played a role. He loves how the top of the bump out in the shelves came out, so now he knows. The top is currently warped, but beautiful. He said that when he cuts it to hinge in the part that lifts, there will be nothing there to hold down the warp. I am so excited to see what it all looks like finished. It looks so good now, he doesn't want to do anything to mess it up. . .

Hooray for Snow Days

Every school is closed, including colleges Libraries are closed, even trash pick up is canceled for today. It is drifty and with the wind chill it is -15 outside. We are both home. Hooray! I didn't feel very good this morning, so i am so thankful for a snow day. I got home kind of late from my shower and then had a bunch of phone calls to make, so i didn't get much sleep either. Now, i feel pretty good. There are four of us that are pregnant at work. Sara (the one on the left) was put on bed rest last week. She is due at the end of February. Then i have the next closest due date- march 25th. Then Jessica is March 29th (i think) and Shonda is April 1st. We are all so close. It is fun to share stories, especially with Shonda because this is her first baby too. This is a page from a book that i got at the shower. It is so funny. Someone took a picture of it for me!My shower yesterday was so fun and touching. I was surprised by how many people showed up. I got a little teary when i was thanking everyone, but other than that i made it without crying. Gertie got the most adorable clothes, cuddly blankets, wonderful bath products, cute books, and her car seat and all of its accompaniments.

I got home to a bunch of messages on the machine. My step-dad is in a drug induced coma right now. It was a yucky ending to a wonderful day.

Today, i am washing Gertie's clothes. I should start thank-you notes too.

Next Year

Next year I won't be. . .

• going on field trips
• writing the agenda on the board
• reading aloud Where the Red Fern Grows
• teaching arrays and area
• eating lunch with my friends everyday
• watching kids swish fluoride in their mouths and spit it up
• writing out name tags
• buying markers, colored pencils, scissors, and glue sticks for 26 kids
• entering grades
• taking attendance
• smelling pancake on a stick
• doing the lunch count
• writing biweekly newsletters
• cleaning the board
• meeting with parents
• attending grade level meetings
• getting "professionally developed"
• going out for recess duty
• conversing with adults on a regular basis (except for TJ)
  

Wow the list could go on. I just got back from the board meeting and they approved the superintendent's recommendation to give me unpaid leave. As i was driving home, it all became so real. I am looking forward to next year. I don't know what to expect, but i am definitely willing to give it a try. I might love it, i might not, but at this time i feel it is right for Gertie and for us. I am just so excited!!!

Immigration Gumballs

This is kind of long (9 min.), but interesting. You have to be patient to get to the gumball part. . .Just wondering what people think. My friend pointed me to it.

Happy Birthday!

Today TJ turned 29. I thought of him all day at work, hoping that he was having a great birthday. We worked at school for a little while and then went out to eat. We have kind of been celebrating his birthday throughout the week. I made him Fred cake on Tuesday (i remembered to make a cake this yea) and gave him is present on Sunday. Today he got his card. And cards from family came. He is loved.I really can't begin to write about how God has blessed me with such an amazing husband and friend. I love all his weirdnesses. I love his heart and his mind. I love the good that he does with his hands and with his words. I love his compassion for people and his nonjudgmental ways. I love the way he listens intently to others. I love the way he makes me giggle until i cry. I love the way he kisses my forehead and wipes away sorrowful tears. I love his long hugs and his lingering kisses. I love how he talks to Gertie and stops at meijers almost daily to get me Simply Apple Juice, so i can drink it with crushed ice. I love when he rubs my head at night as i drift off to sleep and i love his TJ laugh that shakes his belly as he holds it. I could go on and on. . . I love him.

Snow day for both

I think over the last 6 years, TJ has only had one snow day and i have had too many to count. So, when i looked on the TV this morning i ran into the bathroom to where TJ was taking a shower and i made up the best song and dance to announce that we did indeed both have Snow Day. I was hoping and praying for one. Today, i was supposed to leave school at 8:45 with 26 students and take them to the muskegon museum, eat lunch there and then go straight to pool school at the Y. I was in for an exhausting day, one in which i wasn't sure if i would make it. But now i am eating a warm orange roll with a cold glass of milk. The sun is pouring into the house and the sticky snow looks amazing stuck to the branches. I am not sure if i am going anywhere. Well, i have to go to school to drop off sub plans for the morning tomorrow because i have a conference to go to in Muskegon tomorrow. Our driveway is pretty crazy. TJ's truck got stuck in the driveway after we got back from Shelby last night. We (mostly TJ) was out there until 8:45 trying to rescue his truck while i made the S10's clutch cry. I haven't driven a stick since about 12 years ago when i cruised around in my moldy chevette. I stalled the truck once and spun the tires a number of times, but finally the truck was freed. I think on our way to school and the secretary of state we are going to stop at pikadills and have some warm homemade soup. YUM!

Why i love being a teacher. . .

My students got to choose to write a fable or a tall tale. I am just getting around to correcting them and i had to share a sentence from one of them. . .

"She traveled really far far away. She traveled to texas, tokieo, indeana, Mrs. Sipie, and last but not least Japan."

It was the Mrs. Sipie that got me laughing. I love kids. They make me smile.

Getting Ready

My friend started going into labor six weeks before her due date. That got me thinking. . . how ready am i? I am only nine weeks off. She is a teacher friend that teaches across the hall, so i was left to help out the sub. She didn't have time to get ready, to leave instructions, to leave some sort of a plan on what needs to be taught while she is gone. So, i just spent an hour typing out a "Helpful Hint" paper my long-term sub/friend. I have along way to go, but i already feel better. We have different user names and passwords for our e-mail, gradebook and attendance program, and telephone. Just having those ready for him saves three phone calls once little Gertie is with us! Because he has been a teacher for 30 years, i don't have any worries. I wrote that he can follow my plans, or do what he wants, as long as he does the common assessments for the report cards. He should have fun. There is all that little junk to explain like the monthly book orders, what kids expect on their birthdays, what books we have already read from the third grade book closet, how to pack up my room at the end of the year, etc.

I officially hand delivered my FMLA leave paper and my letter to the superintendent requesting a child-care leave for next year. I am anxious to hear back. This is all so real, yet so not.

Anyway, i am sure i will blog more today, but for now, i am returning to my ' helpful Hints.' I am sure i will 'nest' in my classroom as well as in my home. TJ is, of course, in the garage working away. We did find a bullet heater for the garage that takes Kerosene or Diesel for %50 off at The Home Depot. Good thing because it is 7 degrees out. Lowes and The Home Depot have been out of them forever, but i guess that was a good thing because now they are on sale. I also notice $5 dollars off a gallon of paint now until Monday, so now would be a good time to make a final decision on paint colors for Gertie's room.

Sticky Snow

Snow is stuck on each and every branch and power line and i am sure that is why Montague doesn't have power. Yes, i am home on a day when i should be teaching 26 little kids. I am so relieved, excited, and thankful. I woke up at 4:30 and could not go back to sleep. I looked outside and by looking at the roads knew we had school. Little did i know that school did not have any power. Hip Hip Hooray!! I was up from 4:30 - 6:30 and went back to bed. It was wonderful.

Last night, while driving back from a friend's house, i thought i was going to die. I have never been in such a snow storm with such sloppy roads and terrible visibility. I was driving in unfamiliar roads in an unfamiliar rental car. TJ was driving ahead of me, thank goodness, and he even said it was absolutely terrible. By the time i got home after nine, my stomach was upset, i had a headache and i was so stiff. TJ had to stop to clear the headlights because he knew neither one of us could see where we were going, and there was deep ditches on both sides of the road. Yuck! It felt so good to be home. And it feels so good to be home. Kim was right~ thanks Kim!

Will this Week Ever End?

This first week back is a killer. Maybe because of the humid pool school that made me feel sick on Tuesday, or maybe the IEP that i had during planning today, or maybe because it is the first week back after freedom. I am tired. I don't know how much longer i can take this week. Will it ever end? I also have so much going on after school that is not allowing me to keep up with correcting papers or with sleep.

But, i learned today that the white car is fixed and ready for pick-up and i am scrapbooking with friends on Friday. I also learned yesterday that these same friends are throwing a shower for me for people at work at the end of this month. Exciting! My first shower. . . i wonder how many times i will say "cute"? I truly love the people i work with. I am going to miss them so unbelievably much next year. It is really starting to sink in, especially when i look around the room and file things away to use again. I still have to get it okayed, but the word is out. . . people know and are giving me their opinions. My principal now knows, not by my doing, but that is okay. It is not like it was top secret. I was going to tell him right before i filed the paper work, and that is still my plan, unless he brings it up. Time is going by. Things are good. We are both (meaning me and TJ) so exhausted. And i know TJ is just a little stressed about building this built in. It will all work out. That i am confident about.

Cutest Pillow EVER!!!

Okay, so i have spent my morning making another pillow. I am really enjoying myself. I act as though Gertie can't come until my pillows are made. . . it is a little strange i must admit. Anyway, this is by far my favorite pillow. I added pink piping between each stretch of fabric, green chenille ric rac on top of the microfleece, and purple pom pom balls for trim. The back is the softest chenille fleece fabric. TJ loves the stuff.Now, i should probably get some other stuff done on my list. . .this is my last official day of vacation. The next break is mid-winter break. It is going to be a long stretch.

Dear Truck

Dear Red S10 Pickup,

I know we haven't always gotten along. I know i have been known to complain about your grumbling and groaning and your shaking and rattling, and for that i am truly sorry. When i think back we have such a history. i still see the faded smiley face sticker i stuck to your dashboard to make TJ smile years ago. I still see the faded Taylor sticker in your back window. You used to be our date mobile, our main way of getting around. Sometime in my snobbiness, i lost appreciation for you, and for that again i am sorry. Although, you must admit that i was very thankful for you this summer during our landscaping project and treated you with utmost care.

You have over 100,000 miles and have been with TJ for almost 10 years. He truly loves you. He actually enjoys driving you. I must confess, sometimes i get jealous of you. Because you are a stick, you often take TJ's hand off of my knee. I guess i can handle that.

Anyway, this letter is primarily to thank you for all you have done recently. You really came through for us as now that you are our only source of transportation. With your rebuilt transmission and exhaust system, you really are a good little truck. . . a truck that has gotten my husband to work every day this week, gotten us to our ultrasound to see our baby girl and to Jo-anns to buy some fringe. Even though you don't have heated seats, a back seat, or a covered cargo area. . . i still love you and am thankful for you helping us through this tough time. You know, TJ has never doubted you. He is a loyal and faithful owner. . . me not so much.

Thanks again and keep up the good work!
Lindsey

P.S. Is there any way you can make it so the passenger side seatbelt doesn't lock on me more and more every time i move. I feel as if the seat is holding me hostage. If you can't, i understand. I am still thankful for you.

More Sewing

Today i finished two pillows. I had a problem with the pom pom fringe because it is so thick. The thickness made it difficult to pin the two right sides together. I intended the fringe to go all the way around the outside seam, but plans quickly changed when i couldn't pin the two layers together and still manage to make the raw edges line up. Anyway, here are some pillow pictures. . . i know. so exciting. . .

Yes, those are tiny honey pots and Eeyore buttons

This pillow turned out funny looking. The back is bumpy green . This is my first attempt at piping. . . there is green and pink piping around the pictures. It turned out much more boring looking than in my head.

Have I mentioned that I love my Sewing Machine?

Today, i started making a pillow that has a flap and three buttons. It helped me forget that i was carless today. Even if TJ was home, i still don't have a car that i can drive. I haven't driven a stick in 10 years. I changed my presser foot on my sewing machine by putting my button hole foot in. The cool thing is is that i put my button in the foot and then the machine automatically knows the length of the button hole it has to make. Of course my three buttons have little pictures of classic eeyore. I am making the pillow with plaid fabric that has pooh honey pots every now and then in the pattern. When cutting and laying out the fabric, i am proud to write that i was able to actually line up the lines on the button flap. I was very impressed with myself. The fabric seems a little boyish, so i think i am going to get some pink piping or pink poof ball fringe for the edge of the pillow. That will make it more girly and more funky. I love my machine. It is so easy to use and seems to love me back.

Today, the effects of the snowplow clearing our road was our very full recycling box launched across our driveway. I peeked outside to see Simply Apple Juice containers and newspaper scattered all over the yard, road, and ditch. I got my exercise today as i tromped through the deep snow to collect our trash. But, i went out after hearing from the doctor that my sugar levels are good, so i was in a good mood while bending and tromping and huffing and puffing.

Tonight, i am going to have to turn in early. I feel exhausted. I didn't sleep well last night and it is catching up with me. :) TJ is napping as i write, but he had a full day of school today. Tomorrow he is taking a half day off so he can go and see our baby girl on the ultrasound monitor with me. We are both so excited. Check baby ellis blog for pictures tomorrow!

Wonderful surprise

yesterday, i got a phone call in the morning from my friend Mary. The next time we planned on seeing each other was in April when she came to visit the baby. She was calling because she was in Muskegon. I was excited all day to know that i would be able to see her for a couple of hours that night. TJ built forts with Keller and played monster, horse, and tyrannosauruses rex, while Mary and i talked. It was wonderful.

Yesterday, TJ also started gluing the face of the window seat on. It looks beautiful. And he put the crib together. When i woke up during the night, i could see it in the nursery. It made me smile. We don't have the mattress yet, so i can't put the sheets and stuff on it, but it still looks adorable. I started painting the lamp for Gertie's room. It is my old lamp from when i was little. The lamp base has three little drawers that i am going to paint different colors and then i am going to put bumpy fleece on the shade and pom pom balls hanging from the rim.

Update

The tow truck is coming to pick up my car and take it to a body shop. A husband of one of my friends owns a body shop, so we are giving him lots of business with two cars, especially the red one. Who knows when i will see Big Red again. The good news is the white car was far from being considered totaled. We were worried about that because the car is so very valuable to us. . . it is a good car with no monthly payments. We are going to drive the white car for a few more days, since the adjuster can't come see it until Wednesday, but she wants to see it at the body shop. Then we will be down to one car. . . the s10 truck, which i cannot really drive and don't really want to. I don't have school next week, so it should all work out. . . hopefully.

Christmas was nice. It didn't quite feel the same. That could be because of many things. . . i miss my mom, i miss my grandma, jason wasn't there, we were carless, we didn't go to the Eve service, and we got into town late. It was great to see everyone and to hang out a little bit with them.

I have been living in a soft, brown maternity sweat suit i got from gail and steve. My dad made me the nicest candles and soaps. Our Christmas gifts are put away and i put all the Christmas stuff away yesterday. We played with our digital photo frame. Watched Transformers, Mean Girls, and Shrek the third. All my new maternity clothes are neatly hung in my closet. We moved the living room back to normal. We have been feasting on cookies. I have been sipping chai and reading a Mary Higgins Clark book. TJ used Trevor's chainsaw to cut up the tree into manageable pieces. We are on our way out the door to go shopping and spend some gift cards. Then we are headed back. TJ is going to work on the built-in and i am going to sew.

I have many plans for my next week off. I have to clear up the fiasco with a credit card that i haven't used since 2001, but has a charge from 2004 from St. Louis, a place i have never been. I have/want to sew for little Gertie. I want to organize all our electronic pictures into folders and hopefully in one spot, instead of several. There is always school work. I need to make loopies. I have already been paid for one that needs to be made. I want to get my haircut. I love having time off. I am going to make sure to relax as well. :)

Stranded

We are pretty ticked. When i called the insurance company yesterday to file a claim, the lady told me that we would most likely hear from a representative today. Well, we called the office, and they are close today. That lady really messed up our plans. If we knew sooner that a representative would not get in touch with us, we could have rented a car yesterday and left as planned. Instead, we learn after all the car rental places are closed for the day. Jered so kindly offered to pick us up after work today and drive us into town, but we were all a little worried about space with three bodies, luggage, and , of course, gifts. Steve is on his way over now to pick us up. I am sure he did not want to spend 6 hours on the road on Christmas Eve. We will miss the Christmas Eve service.

When TJ gets back into town, instead of working on the built in like he had hoped, he is going to be busy taking care of a tree, debris, and plans for getting two cars repaired. And, he goes back on the 2nd. This just kinda stinks. I am trying to stay positive and so far, it is actually working!

We have been enjoying our kitties and our new table. . .

Insurance proof. . .

Change of Plans

Well, we were supposed to head out of town today. But waking up to both cars crushed by a tree changed our plans. It is very windy here. The wind took down a tall pine tree, landing it right down on both of our cars. The red saturn got the brunt of it. It looks as if it was in a rollover accident. The roof is all pushed in, my door frame is completely bent, the windshield is broken, the driver window is broken, there is bark and sap in the inside of my car, and two doors won't open. The white car's hood is damaged and we are not yet sure of the damage under the hood. We don't want to open it up until the insurance company contacts us. The trunk landed on both. . .

This in combination with my 12 hour fasting four hour glucose test yesterday is not a great way to start vacation.

almost free

A half day away from Freedom for two weeks. I can hardly contain myself. The kids are wild and filled with excitement about Santa's visit. A half day away. . .

Oh, and our new table, chairs and bench come today!

Restlessly Tired

I am so restless. I am pacing around the house, yet i am so exhausted. I am waiting for my hubby to get home from Traverse City. The house has been too quiet that last three days and my classroom has been too boisterous. I don't feel like reading. I don't feel like eating. I don't feel like doing school work or cleaning up. I am restless.

I still have so many Christmas presents to buy. I don't think i have ever been this behind. The ones i do have are at least wrapped and ready to go, but i still have so many people who are presentless. Yikes!

All is quiet

The dishwasher is humming. TJ is napping. The tree and village lights are glowing. Wrapped presents sit under the tree sparkling. It is so peaceful. Jered, Daddy-o, Aunt Carol and Uncle Mike just left. We were celebrating jered's birthday. Dad brought a beautiful poinsettia plant for us and TJ's favorite homemade cookies. I have the warm inside feeling that only family brings. I love the conversation, the laughter, the food, the company. I love that everyone is so different, yet there we are sitting in the same room. . . loving each other. I am so thankful God put all these wonderful people in my life because i might not have surrounded myself or had the opportunity to surround myself with them. I am glad i get to see them all in a few weeks. Jason was missed, though and he will be at Christmas time too. It was so nice to have everyone over. Next weekend gail and steve are coming over. I love having visitors.

Now i really don't want to do school work. I have to. It seems to make the house so much less peaceful as soon as i drag my bag of school stuff out. I worked a little before family came, but didn't finish. It is hanging over my head. I really just want to curl up with a good book and drift off to sleep. As i write this, i immediately try to think of the ramifications of doing just that. . . too many to count.

Any time now

Any time now i should see my hubby's face and know that he is safe and sound. He left at 6 this morning and has basically been lifting stuff or driving all day. Everyone got really nice furniture out of it. He has so much to do when he gets home. It is after 8 now. He is not planned at all for tomorrow. Yesterday, instead of doing school work, we were moving furniture around to make room for the new additions. Moving things downstairs wasn't all that easy because it required cleaning up and organizing the basement. It looks really good down there, now. I have a whole craft area for my scrapbooking and sewing. We also moved the tank desk down there with the computer. In the red room going in its place is a day bed for visitors (finally we have a place to offer people to stay) and book shelves with glass doors.

Anyway, the house looks so festive. The tree is up (complete with its tinfoil hand-made star from our first Christmas together), Norvin the Reindeer is illuminated and moving outside (although, this year he is close to the house because i didn't want to take tj's shop extension cord), the evergreen lighted swoops adorn the front porch, villages look alive and bustling, snowflakes are scattered throughout the house, the beautiful wreath hangs on the door welcoming all who come, mostly empty Christmas boxes are restacked downstairs, Christmas Boyds are sitting and waiting for the holiday to come, and the mistletoe is hanging awaiting a couple of lovebirds to stand under it. I am tired, too. We both had long days. I think mine was more fun, though! I love all the lights at night. AND mixed with my baby kicking me. . . i feel so content, happy, and peaceful. I cannot wait to see my husband.

I did make TJ brownies to greet him when he gets home.

Bad timing

This morning at 6, TJ set out to grand rapids to pick up jered and then to the detriot area to meet my dad, aunt and uncle to move the rest of my granna's furniture out of her apartment. There was a sheet of ice over everything. . . my dad also had to travel in not-so -nice conditions. What a bad day to move. I am very thankful for cell phones today. I know a phone won't protect TJ, but it sure gives me peace of mind to know that he has one, especially on a long day full of driving.

Yesterday was such a busy day. We had to make room for the furniture and that included moving my craft table and our desktop computer downstairs. I also had to clear things out that Jered is going to help tj move today, that is way too heavy for me to help move. Today, i am doing school work, putting up the tree, finishing the rest of the christmas items, and doing laundry.

Ice scraper

After days of forgetting, i finally remembered to put my ice scraper back in my car. I guess i often remembered, but i was never at a place where i could do something about it. Teaching kids to subtract three digit numbers with two regroupings as the vision of my ice scraper entered my head was not a useful time. Nor was it when i was sitting in a dreadful meeting this morning or in the shower this morning. But, today as i was washing dishes, the image of my ice scraper came to me. I didn't want to stop to dry my hands only to get them wet again, so I told TJ "when i turn off the water, can you blurt out ice scraper for me?" He didn't need to. . .just the effort of saying ice scraper made me remember once the water was turned off. Finally, i can be at peace. What a day full of success. I hope you had a day that was as successful as mine.

Goodbye Grumpiness

Have you ever had one of those days of unexplained grumpiness? That describes my day (poor TJ) I think school is to blame, but i am not sure. I had such a wonderful day yesterday setting up my villages, sewing, reading, shopping for a table, and relaxing. Then today happened. I decided that i did not need to devote all day to school work, so i decided to go shopping. I think that made it worse. Because i had to eventually come home and get to work. Report cards are due this week, along with parent teacher conferences and only one day that has planning for me this week.

So, now i finally feel the grumpiness leaving me. Maybe it leaves when baby ellis kicks. Maybe it leaves when i relax with a good book, turn off most of the lights except for my lighted village. Maybe it leaves when i eat a dark chocolate drenched mint milano cookie. Maybe it leaves when i see TJ enjoying his hobby in the garage by working on the built in. Whatever made it leave, i am thankful for. I hope this week goes quickly.

Thank You, Granna

With some of my granna's inheritance money, i ordered a new dining room table, bench, and chairs today from Bells of Whitehall. I have been wanting a new table for years now. Our current table only seats four, leaves no room in the middle for food, and is badly dinged up. We are thankful for the table. When TJ and i first got married, our table was a card table. Then Sarah gave us this table and four chairs. It is still a sturdy table, just not very big.

Granna has bought us the crib for baby ellis, our entertainment center, and our dresser. Because of her, we have some beautiful furniture. This table is one that will be with us forever. . . and we got it for a real excellent price. We went for the bench, to save our paint job on the wall that is so close to the table. . . and we love the look of benches. . . they are hard to find. It is a custom order because they can not keep them in stock, so we could get it anywhere from 1 week to 6. I hope sooner than later. Now when we have company, we can actually all sit down. How exciting!!

Thank You, Granna!

Description:

42"W X 60"(W/2-16"LF)-92"

Additional Information:

Solid oak trestle table features an equalizing ball bearing metal glide leaf system which allows a single person to use. Also has self storage for both leaves. The bench also has additional storage.

Apple Juice

TJ just got back from meijer and found the greatest apple juice on earth. It is called Simply Apple. . . we get Simply Orange, but didn't know they had apple. It has no preservatives and no added water. . . just 100% pure pressed apples. And it is pasteurized. Yippee Skippie!!! It is yummy goodness, especially with crushed ice.

Stranded with a Perfectly Good Car

Friday, i had to race to north muskegon from work to get my flu shot and then race back up by work to meet my friends for scrapbooking. My appointment was at 4, and they actually took me ten minutes early. I was so excited because that meant that i would not be late to scrapbooking and dinner. I got into my car, my arm a little soar, and put the key in the ignition and it would not turn. The steering wheel was completely locked and the ignition was too. Now this is just a reminder that i am pregnant, so i have the patience of a pregnant person, i just got a shot in my arm, i was supposed to be somewhere, i don't have a cell phone, and i am sitting in a one year old car that is refusing to let me start it. I tried for a half hour trying to start my car, tilt my steering wheel, read my owner's manual, move the gear shifter, insert the key gently, harshly, upside down. No luck. Because i didn't even have heat, it was starting to get cold. I went back into the doctor's office, asked to borrow their phone, and i called my husband. I am not going to write how it ended. . . you might be able to find the ending on his blog.

The result of this? We both have brand new, first ever cell phones. Mine is pink. The people at verizon could not believe that we had never had one. I think we are one of the last people to get one. We will see if we both need to have one. We went in thinking only one phone, but you know how it goes. I will have greater peace of mind this winter.

We are Back

It has been a long three days. A lot of waiting. A lot of tears. A lot of hugs. A lot of small talk. It feels good to be back. I tried unpacking our luggage and the stuff from my granna'a apartment, but i am so out of energy. Friday, right after school, i have friends coming over for scrapbooking, which means tomorrow night i need to clean the house and go grocery shopping so that i have something to feed them. Then in less than a week, we will be back on the east side of the state for Thanksgiving. Busy. My school plans are so screwed up, but i am not going to worry about it tonight. I feel like it is 9 and it is only 6. I am going to have to go to bed early tonight.

Well, just wanted to check in. I am going to go now.

Granna

My dad called at 10:30 last night to let us know that Granna had passed away. I don't think it will really hit me until i get into town and see the rest of my family. Plans are up in the air as of now, and i just continue to sit at home and wait. My dad's birthday is Monday. . . i don't think it is going to be a good day for him. I'm not sure of jason's plans. i miss him greatly. I need to make sub plans, but i am not sure for what days yet.

I feel really bad for my dad and my aunt. I am sure they are exhausted, sad, and numb. Yuck. . .

My Granna

Today my Grandma turned 85. I call her granna because she hates the sound of granny and grandmother sounded too snobby to her. . .so Granna was invented. When i called, my aunt picked up the phone, which is not abnormal because she lives there most of the week. What was abnormal is that when my aunt held the phone up to my granna's ear so that i could wish her a happy birthday there was moaning and groaning coming from the other end. I can still hear that horrible repeated groan. My aunt was just told by the hospice nurse that my granna has about 48 hours left in her life. She cried when telling me, and i cry when writing about it.

I don't really know what to do. I want to visit and say goodbye, but i don't want to visit a dying, groaning granna and say goodbye for the last time. The last time i left her, which was a couple of weeks ago, she was with it. We hugged and kissed and i told her i loved her. She returned the sentiment and then i waved and said i will see her soon. That is a better way to say goodbye i think. Or am i just in denial? I don't have any terrible visions of my mom dying. . . it was so sudden. I know George does and he probably replays them over and over in his head, like i play over and over in my head the phone conversation when he told me my mom was gone. I have terrible memories of my grandpa trying to breathe before he passed away. The rasping sound of him trying to get air will stay with me forever. Now, i have the sound of my granna's groans. Will i have any regrets if i don't go say goodbye? She knows i love her. Would she be happier if i came and said goodbye? Would she be with it enough to know? Right now, i have a vision of the last time i saw her in my head. . .of her propped up in her bedroom surrounded by family photos, hooked up to oxygen, smiling and laughing and being so excited to meet baby ellis. I think that is how i want to remember her. Is that being selfish?

Staying Home

I got up, felt pretty miserable, but decided i needed to go into school. I really don't have sick days to use. . .i guess i do if i don't get put on bed rest or don't have a C section. Otherwise i am short on sick days. I didn't put any eye make-up on due to constant watering of my eyes. By the time i got to work, i felt terrible. I decided that with a lot of new stuff i was introducing, two meetings to go to, and recess duty that it would be better for me if i stayed home and was able to rest. The day at school was not going to be an easy one, like on Friday when i felt crappy. So, i might have just taken an unpaid day off, but i do feel rested and better. I ate TJ's homemade chicken noodle soup and drank a ton of juice. I slept a ton. In fact, i never really left the couch. Now, i am going to bed to get even more sleep. Wednesday is our doctor appointment. . . hopefully we can hear our little girl's heart beat!!

My Morning

So far, i got up and sat on the couch for an hour and a half with a caffeine free chai latte and a box of kleenex. This should be a fun day. My plans for getting a lot done are vanishing. I just want to get better and fast. I think now i will drink a huge glass of orange juice mixed with sprite (an Ellis thing, not a Michael thing) and sit on the couch for a little longer. I did manage to get a Pregnancy magazine read, but i really wanted to do laundry, clean, and get my schoolwork done. YIKES!

Nasty Cold

I have had a nasty cold for the last couple of days. . . almost didn't make it through school on Friday due to my throat and voice. I am trying to rest up this weekend, but as i look around i see so much i need to do. On Friday, i came right home from school and we went to GR to Babies R Us to register. That was so much fun. TJ was so helpful. Instead of saying "i don't know" he gave his opinion and helped immensely with the big stuff. He had already done a lot of reading/research on the stroller and car seat. It took a long time, and we kind of knew what big stuff we wanted already. It was things like bottles that was so overwhelming we just skipped it. There are so many kinds and we had no idea. We can update our registry online once we decide, and we want to register at Target too. They have the cutest classic pooh stuff and they are close to everyone. TJ got us a room at the new Marriott and we stayed the night. He got a room with a soaking tub, which is just what i needed after a long day on my feet. It felt wonderful. We woke up and headed to the Brandywine to eat the best breakfast food and to say hello to my brother, who appeared not to have to work there today. That kind of stunk.

I came home and took a nap. I feel pretty miserable. I hope Baby Ellis doesn't even know that i am sick. . .

Celebrating

After our ultrasound we planned on going out to eat to celebrate...if it was a boy we were going to New Holland Brewing Company (TJ suggested that knowing it was far away, but also being confident we were having a girl). If it was a girl we were going to go to 2 Tonys in Spring Lake. I had the tastiest Fettuccine Alfredo ever! Then we went to Target to buy a little newborn hat. :)

Check out the baby ellis blog for more details.

Money Well Spent

Our (mostly TJ's) life in the fall will be made easier by this purchase. . .

It blows OR sucks & shreds leaves.
You would not beleive the amount of leaves that have carpeted our lawn. It is so thick, the grass is completely buried. TJ would come home everyday and as he pulled into the driveway, would feel an overwhelmed feeling hit him.

Today, i am going to the mall and then i am going to come home and make loopies and clean the house. I have high hopes for my energy today!

Happy Saturday! I love being home.

Sleeping In

I slept in an hour today. Instead of 5:15, i got up at 6:15. It is becoming a Friday tradition for me. That means i got almost 10 hours of sleep last night. I have just been feeling so incredibly tired lately. I like Fridays, not just because it is the last day of the work week, but i am more relaxed with the kids. We have more fun, laugh more, and i am much more flexible.

I am so excited that we are staying home this weekend. I have quite a huge list of things i need to get done. My loopie basket is almost empty at school. I have mums to plant and ornamental grass to move. The house needs dusting and cleaning. Laundry, there is always laundry. Schoolwork, there is always schoolwork, too. I hope to eat a tasty pot roast. . .i miss my mom's pot roast. I want to bring in the patio and porch furniture. I wonder how much i will get done. I hope i am motivated and full of energy that i just don't know what to do with!

Well, i should probably go get ready for school. My grape juice is gone.