The intention was there. I was going to wake up today and go to church, do school work, make some blankets, clean and watch Desparate Housewives with friends. The church thing is aready not happening. I feel like staying home, sipping chai and cuddling up with a book or something. Today my mom would have turned 59.
I am glad that the rain has stopped. The sun is rising. Yesterday, TJ and i went to grand Rapids. It was exciting. . . just what i needed. To spend some money, eat out, and enjoy TJ's company removed from the house that needs to be cleaned and the stack of papers that needs correcting. I got some clothes that actually fit. I am down 4 sizes and all my clothes were looking frumpy. I found some good deals. Then, we just made it to a surprise birthday party filled with babies. Normally, TJ and i kind of prepare ourselves, pray, and then go. . . BUT we forgot to prepare ourselves for all the babies. Our car ride home was pretty much silent and sad. Once home, we did Soduko(i ate my leftover chocolate chip scone) and fell asleep.
So, i guess i will get my day started, void of church. I was really looking forward to going and heairng the songs again, but i think i will stay home for now.
5 comments:
It was really good to see you guys last night. I hope you change your mind, at least about getting together tonight...
I pray all the time for a child to come into your life. I pray too that as the wait increases you will be filled with hope and not despair.
And I hope you can see some of these babies as the symbols of that hope. From years and years, we've wondered if we'd ever have an Adeline.
Samuel (Will) and Isaac are named after children who were longed for like they were (for eight years).
In a time when women were considered property and children were expendable assets, the lens of scripture takes a moment to identify with the hurt of a childless woman.
So while church can and will be a painful reminder of loss, it can also be a reminder of hope. God has been meeting this need for thousands of years, and he still is today.
While the last five years of trying to have children were the most difficult, we can't imagine anything worse than *not* having Will and Isaac. The events surrounding their adoption were nothing less than miraculous, every detail held precariously in place by other details reaching back for years, many of them shaped in our infertility pain.
I say all of this to encourage you, *not* to say I know how you feel.
Much Love, Daniel
Hopefully the writing and the chai were healing.
We did miss you this morning. And every sunday morning that we don't get to spend together any more.
Maybe tonight?
I wish i could say something...anything to make all your pain go away. And the waiting to end.
You *will* be the most amazing parents. Treasuring your children as most other people cannot. And teaching them more than most parents are able.
We pray often for these much loved children to come soon. And each time I think of you...I determine to pray more fiercely, and more frequently.
We love you.
Sometimes it's nice to just stay home and relax. I know how busy you guys get during the school year.
Hope to see both of you soon!
Happy Birthday to Sweet Violet.
I would take your sadness and pain from you, if I only I could.
Much love, Gail
There is not much more I can say that Daniel and Angela haven't said already. Know that James and I care and love you both very much. We are praying for you and for that miraculous time when the Lord places Little "Ellis" in your lives.
We love you,
James and Charity
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