Wonderful surprise

yesterday, i got a phone call in the morning from my friend Mary. The next time we planned on seeing each other was in April when she came to visit the baby. She was calling because she was in Muskegon. I was excited all day to know that i would be able to see her for a couple of hours that night. TJ built forts with Keller and played monster, horse, and tyrannosauruses rex, while Mary and i talked. It was wonderful.

Yesterday, TJ also started gluing the face of the window seat on. It looks beautiful. And he put the crib together. When i woke up during the night, i could see it in the nursery. It made me smile. We don't have the mattress yet, so i can't put the sheets and stuff on it, but it still looks adorable. I started painting the lamp for Gertie's room. It is my old lamp from when i was little. The lamp base has three little drawers that i am going to paint different colors and then i am going to put bumpy fleece on the shade and pom pom balls hanging from the rim.

Update

The tow truck is coming to pick up my car and take it to a body shop. A husband of one of my friends owns a body shop, so we are giving him lots of business with two cars, especially the red one. Who knows when i will see Big Red again. The good news is the white car was far from being considered totaled. We were worried about that because the car is so very valuable to us. . . it is a good car with no monthly payments. We are going to drive the white car for a few more days, since the adjuster can't come see it until Wednesday, but she wants to see it at the body shop. Then we will be down to one car. . . the s10 truck, which i cannot really drive and don't really want to. I don't have school next week, so it should all work out. . . hopefully.

Christmas was nice. It didn't quite feel the same. That could be because of many things. . . i miss my mom, i miss my grandma, jason wasn't there, we were carless, we didn't go to the Eve service, and we got into town late. It was great to see everyone and to hang out a little bit with them.

I have been living in a soft, brown maternity sweat suit i got from gail and steve. My dad made me the nicest candles and soaps. Our Christmas gifts are put away and i put all the Christmas stuff away yesterday. We played with our digital photo frame. Watched Transformers, Mean Girls, and Shrek the third. All my new maternity clothes are neatly hung in my closet. We moved the living room back to normal. We have been feasting on cookies. I have been sipping chai and reading a Mary Higgins Clark book. TJ used Trevor's chainsaw to cut up the tree into manageable pieces. We are on our way out the door to go shopping and spend some gift cards. Then we are headed back. TJ is going to work on the built-in and i am going to sew.

I have many plans for my next week off. I have to clear up the fiasco with a credit card that i haven't used since 2001, but has a charge from 2004 from St. Louis, a place i have never been. I have/want to sew for little Gertie. I want to organize all our electronic pictures into folders and hopefully in one spot, instead of several. There is always school work. I need to make loopies. I have already been paid for one that needs to be made. I want to get my haircut. I love having time off. I am going to make sure to relax as well. :)

Stranded

We are pretty ticked. When i called the insurance company yesterday to file a claim, the lady told me that we would most likely hear from a representative today. Well, we called the office, and they are close today. That lady really messed up our plans. If we knew sooner that a representative would not get in touch with us, we could have rented a car yesterday and left as planned. Instead, we learn after all the car rental places are closed for the day. Jered so kindly offered to pick us up after work today and drive us into town, but we were all a little worried about space with three bodies, luggage, and , of course, gifts. Steve is on his way over now to pick us up. I am sure he did not want to spend 6 hours on the road on Christmas Eve. We will miss the Christmas Eve service.

When TJ gets back into town, instead of working on the built in like he had hoped, he is going to be busy taking care of a tree, debris, and plans for getting two cars repaired. And, he goes back on the 2nd. This just kinda stinks. I am trying to stay positive and so far, it is actually working!

We have been enjoying our kitties and our new table. . .

Insurance proof. . .

Change of Plans

Well, we were supposed to head out of town today. But waking up to both cars crushed by a tree changed our plans. It is very windy here. The wind took down a tall pine tree, landing it right down on both of our cars. The red saturn got the brunt of it. It looks as if it was in a rollover accident. The roof is all pushed in, my door frame is completely bent, the windshield is broken, the driver window is broken, there is bark and sap in the inside of my car, and two doors won't open. The white car's hood is damaged and we are not yet sure of the damage under the hood. We don't want to open it up until the insurance company contacts us. The trunk landed on both. . .

This in combination with my 12 hour fasting four hour glucose test yesterday is not a great way to start vacation.

almost free

A half day away from Freedom for two weeks. I can hardly contain myself. The kids are wild and filled with excitement about Santa's visit. A half day away. . .

Oh, and our new table, chairs and bench come today!

Restlessly Tired

I am so restless. I am pacing around the house, yet i am so exhausted. I am waiting for my hubby to get home from Traverse City. The house has been too quiet that last three days and my classroom has been too boisterous. I don't feel like reading. I don't feel like eating. I don't feel like doing school work or cleaning up. I am restless.

I still have so many Christmas presents to buy. I don't think i have ever been this behind. The ones i do have are at least wrapped and ready to go, but i still have so many people who are presentless. Yikes!

All is quiet

The dishwasher is humming. TJ is napping. The tree and village lights are glowing. Wrapped presents sit under the tree sparkling. It is so peaceful. Jered, Daddy-o, Aunt Carol and Uncle Mike just left. We were celebrating jered's birthday. Dad brought a beautiful poinsettia plant for us and TJ's favorite homemade cookies. I have the warm inside feeling that only family brings. I love the conversation, the laughter, the food, the company. I love that everyone is so different, yet there we are sitting in the same room. . . loving each other. I am so thankful God put all these wonderful people in my life because i might not have surrounded myself or had the opportunity to surround myself with them. I am glad i get to see them all in a few weeks. Jason was missed, though and he will be at Christmas time too. It was so nice to have everyone over. Next weekend gail and steve are coming over. I love having visitors.

Now i really don't want to do school work. I have to. It seems to make the house so much less peaceful as soon as i drag my bag of school stuff out. I worked a little before family came, but didn't finish. It is hanging over my head. I really just want to curl up with a good book and drift off to sleep. As i write this, i immediately try to think of the ramifications of doing just that. . . too many to count.

Any time now

Any time now i should see my hubby's face and know that he is safe and sound. He left at 6 this morning and has basically been lifting stuff or driving all day. Everyone got really nice furniture out of it. He has so much to do when he gets home. It is after 8 now. He is not planned at all for tomorrow. Yesterday, instead of doing school work, we were moving furniture around to make room for the new additions. Moving things downstairs wasn't all that easy because it required cleaning up and organizing the basement. It looks really good down there, now. I have a whole craft area for my scrapbooking and sewing. We also moved the tank desk down there with the computer. In the red room going in its place is a day bed for visitors (finally we have a place to offer people to stay) and book shelves with glass doors.

Anyway, the house looks so festive. The tree is up (complete with its tinfoil hand-made star from our first Christmas together), Norvin the Reindeer is illuminated and moving outside (although, this year he is close to the house because i didn't want to take tj's shop extension cord), the evergreen lighted swoops adorn the front porch, villages look alive and bustling, snowflakes are scattered throughout the house, the beautiful wreath hangs on the door welcoming all who come, mostly empty Christmas boxes are restacked downstairs, Christmas Boyds are sitting and waiting for the holiday to come, and the mistletoe is hanging awaiting a couple of lovebirds to stand under it. I am tired, too. We both had long days. I think mine was more fun, though! I love all the lights at night. AND mixed with my baby kicking me. . . i feel so content, happy, and peaceful. I cannot wait to see my husband.

I did make TJ brownies to greet him when he gets home.

Bad timing

This morning at 6, TJ set out to grand rapids to pick up jered and then to the detriot area to meet my dad, aunt and uncle to move the rest of my granna's furniture out of her apartment. There was a sheet of ice over everything. . . my dad also had to travel in not-so -nice conditions. What a bad day to move. I am very thankful for cell phones today. I know a phone won't protect TJ, but it sure gives me peace of mind to know that he has one, especially on a long day full of driving.

Yesterday was such a busy day. We had to make room for the furniture and that included moving my craft table and our desktop computer downstairs. I also had to clear things out that Jered is going to help tj move today, that is way too heavy for me to help move. Today, i am doing school work, putting up the tree, finishing the rest of the christmas items, and doing laundry.

Ice scraper

After days of forgetting, i finally remembered to put my ice scraper back in my car. I guess i often remembered, but i was never at a place where i could do something about it. Teaching kids to subtract three digit numbers with two regroupings as the vision of my ice scraper entered my head was not a useful time. Nor was it when i was sitting in a dreadful meeting this morning or in the shower this morning. But, today as i was washing dishes, the image of my ice scraper came to me. I didn't want to stop to dry my hands only to get them wet again, so I told TJ "when i turn off the water, can you blurt out ice scraper for me?" He didn't need to. . .just the effort of saying ice scraper made me remember once the water was turned off. Finally, i can be at peace. What a day full of success. I hope you had a day that was as successful as mine.

Goodbye Grumpiness

Have you ever had one of those days of unexplained grumpiness? That describes my day (poor TJ) I think school is to blame, but i am not sure. I had such a wonderful day yesterday setting up my villages, sewing, reading, shopping for a table, and relaxing. Then today happened. I decided that i did not need to devote all day to school work, so i decided to go shopping. I think that made it worse. Because i had to eventually come home and get to work. Report cards are due this week, along with parent teacher conferences and only one day that has planning for me this week.

So, now i finally feel the grumpiness leaving me. Maybe it leaves when baby ellis kicks. Maybe it leaves when i relax with a good book, turn off most of the lights except for my lighted village. Maybe it leaves when i eat a dark chocolate drenched mint milano cookie. Maybe it leaves when i see TJ enjoying his hobby in the garage by working on the built in. Whatever made it leave, i am thankful for. I hope this week goes quickly.

Thank You, Granna

With some of my granna's inheritance money, i ordered a new dining room table, bench, and chairs today from Bells of Whitehall. I have been wanting a new table for years now. Our current table only seats four, leaves no room in the middle for food, and is badly dinged up. We are thankful for the table. When TJ and i first got married, our table was a card table. Then Sarah gave us this table and four chairs. It is still a sturdy table, just not very big.

Granna has bought us the crib for baby ellis, our entertainment center, and our dresser. Because of her, we have some beautiful furniture. This table is one that will be with us forever. . . and we got it for a real excellent price. We went for the bench, to save our paint job on the wall that is so close to the table. . . and we love the look of benches. . . they are hard to find. It is a custom order because they can not keep them in stock, so we could get it anywhere from 1 week to 6. I hope sooner than later. Now when we have company, we can actually all sit down. How exciting!!

Thank You, Granna!

Description:

42"W X 60"(W/2-16"LF)-92"

Additional Information:

Solid oak trestle table features an equalizing ball bearing metal glide leaf system which allows a single person to use. Also has self storage for both leaves. The bench also has additional storage.

Apple Juice

TJ just got back from meijer and found the greatest apple juice on earth. It is called Simply Apple. . . we get Simply Orange, but didn't know they had apple. It has no preservatives and no added water. . . just 100% pure pressed apples. And it is pasteurized. Yippee Skippie!!! It is yummy goodness, especially with crushed ice.

Stranded with a Perfectly Good Car

Friday, i had to race to north muskegon from work to get my flu shot and then race back up by work to meet my friends for scrapbooking. My appointment was at 4, and they actually took me ten minutes early. I was so excited because that meant that i would not be late to scrapbooking and dinner. I got into my car, my arm a little soar, and put the key in the ignition and it would not turn. The steering wheel was completely locked and the ignition was too. Now this is just a reminder that i am pregnant, so i have the patience of a pregnant person, i just got a shot in my arm, i was supposed to be somewhere, i don't have a cell phone, and i am sitting in a one year old car that is refusing to let me start it. I tried for a half hour trying to start my car, tilt my steering wheel, read my owner's manual, move the gear shifter, insert the key gently, harshly, upside down. No luck. Because i didn't even have heat, it was starting to get cold. I went back into the doctor's office, asked to borrow their phone, and i called my husband. I am not going to write how it ended. . . you might be able to find the ending on his blog.

The result of this? We both have brand new, first ever cell phones. Mine is pink. The people at verizon could not believe that we had never had one. I think we are one of the last people to get one. We will see if we both need to have one. We went in thinking only one phone, but you know how it goes. I will have greater peace of mind this winter.

We are Back

It has been a long three days. A lot of waiting. A lot of tears. A lot of hugs. A lot of small talk. It feels good to be back. I tried unpacking our luggage and the stuff from my granna'a apartment, but i am so out of energy. Friday, right after school, i have friends coming over for scrapbooking, which means tomorrow night i need to clean the house and go grocery shopping so that i have something to feed them. Then in less than a week, we will be back on the east side of the state for Thanksgiving. Busy. My school plans are so screwed up, but i am not going to worry about it tonight. I feel like it is 9 and it is only 6. I am going to have to go to bed early tonight.

Well, just wanted to check in. I am going to go now.

Granna

My dad called at 10:30 last night to let us know that Granna had passed away. I don't think it will really hit me until i get into town and see the rest of my family. Plans are up in the air as of now, and i just continue to sit at home and wait. My dad's birthday is Monday. . . i don't think it is going to be a good day for him. I'm not sure of jason's plans. i miss him greatly. I need to make sub plans, but i am not sure for what days yet.

I feel really bad for my dad and my aunt. I am sure they are exhausted, sad, and numb. Yuck. . .

My Granna

Today my Grandma turned 85. I call her granna because she hates the sound of granny and grandmother sounded too snobby to her. . .so Granna was invented. When i called, my aunt picked up the phone, which is not abnormal because she lives there most of the week. What was abnormal is that when my aunt held the phone up to my granna's ear so that i could wish her a happy birthday there was moaning and groaning coming from the other end. I can still hear that horrible repeated groan. My aunt was just told by the hospice nurse that my granna has about 48 hours left in her life. She cried when telling me, and i cry when writing about it.

I don't really know what to do. I want to visit and say goodbye, but i don't want to visit a dying, groaning granna and say goodbye for the last time. The last time i left her, which was a couple of weeks ago, she was with it. We hugged and kissed and i told her i loved her. She returned the sentiment and then i waved and said i will see her soon. That is a better way to say goodbye i think. Or am i just in denial? I don't have any terrible visions of my mom dying. . . it was so sudden. I know George does and he probably replays them over and over in his head, like i play over and over in my head the phone conversation when he told me my mom was gone. I have terrible memories of my grandpa trying to breathe before he passed away. The rasping sound of him trying to get air will stay with me forever. Now, i have the sound of my granna's groans. Will i have any regrets if i don't go say goodbye? She knows i love her. Would she be happier if i came and said goodbye? Would she be with it enough to know? Right now, i have a vision of the last time i saw her in my head. . .of her propped up in her bedroom surrounded by family photos, hooked up to oxygen, smiling and laughing and being so excited to meet baby ellis. I think that is how i want to remember her. Is that being selfish?

Staying Home

I got up, felt pretty miserable, but decided i needed to go into school. I really don't have sick days to use. . .i guess i do if i don't get put on bed rest or don't have a C section. Otherwise i am short on sick days. I didn't put any eye make-up on due to constant watering of my eyes. By the time i got to work, i felt terrible. I decided that with a lot of new stuff i was introducing, two meetings to go to, and recess duty that it would be better for me if i stayed home and was able to rest. The day at school was not going to be an easy one, like on Friday when i felt crappy. So, i might have just taken an unpaid day off, but i do feel rested and better. I ate TJ's homemade chicken noodle soup and drank a ton of juice. I slept a ton. In fact, i never really left the couch. Now, i am going to bed to get even more sleep. Wednesday is our doctor appointment. . . hopefully we can hear our little girl's heart beat!!

My Morning

So far, i got up and sat on the couch for an hour and a half with a caffeine free chai latte and a box of kleenex. This should be a fun day. My plans for getting a lot done are vanishing. I just want to get better and fast. I think now i will drink a huge glass of orange juice mixed with sprite (an Ellis thing, not a Michael thing) and sit on the couch for a little longer. I did manage to get a Pregnancy magazine read, but i really wanted to do laundry, clean, and get my schoolwork done. YIKES!

Nasty Cold

I have had a nasty cold for the last couple of days. . . almost didn't make it through school on Friday due to my throat and voice. I am trying to rest up this weekend, but as i look around i see so much i need to do. On Friday, i came right home from school and we went to GR to Babies R Us to register. That was so much fun. TJ was so helpful. Instead of saying "i don't know" he gave his opinion and helped immensely with the big stuff. He had already done a lot of reading/research on the stroller and car seat. It took a long time, and we kind of knew what big stuff we wanted already. It was things like bottles that was so overwhelming we just skipped it. There are so many kinds and we had no idea. We can update our registry online once we decide, and we want to register at Target too. They have the cutest classic pooh stuff and they are close to everyone. TJ got us a room at the new Marriott and we stayed the night. He got a room with a soaking tub, which is just what i needed after a long day on my feet. It felt wonderful. We woke up and headed to the Brandywine to eat the best breakfast food and to say hello to my brother, who appeared not to have to work there today. That kind of stunk.

I came home and took a nap. I feel pretty miserable. I hope Baby Ellis doesn't even know that i am sick. . .

Celebrating

After our ultrasound we planned on going out to eat to celebrate...if it was a boy we were going to New Holland Brewing Company (TJ suggested that knowing it was far away, but also being confident we were having a girl). If it was a girl we were going to go to 2 Tonys in Spring Lake. I had the tastiest Fettuccine Alfredo ever! Then we went to Target to buy a little newborn hat. :)

Check out the baby ellis blog for more details.

Money Well Spent

Our (mostly TJ's) life in the fall will be made easier by this purchase. . .

It blows OR sucks & shreds leaves.
You would not beleive the amount of leaves that have carpeted our lawn. It is so thick, the grass is completely buried. TJ would come home everyday and as he pulled into the driveway, would feel an overwhelmed feeling hit him.

Today, i am going to the mall and then i am going to come home and make loopies and clean the house. I have high hopes for my energy today!

Happy Saturday! I love being home.

Sleeping In

I slept in an hour today. Instead of 5:15, i got up at 6:15. It is becoming a Friday tradition for me. That means i got almost 10 hours of sleep last night. I have just been feeling so incredibly tired lately. I like Fridays, not just because it is the last day of the work week, but i am more relaxed with the kids. We have more fun, laugh more, and i am much more flexible.

I am so excited that we are staying home this weekend. I have quite a huge list of things i need to get done. My loopie basket is almost empty at school. I have mums to plant and ornamental grass to move. The house needs dusting and cleaning. Laundry, there is always laundry. Schoolwork, there is always schoolwork, too. I hope to eat a tasty pot roast. . .i miss my mom's pot roast. I want to bring in the patio and porch furniture. I wonder how much i will get done. I hope i am motivated and full of energy that i just don't know what to do with!

Well, i should probably go get ready for school. My grape juice is gone.

An Amazing Weekend

We just got back from our amazing weekend. The color up in traverse city and then down the west side was absolutely stunning. We left on Friday at about 4:30. We made a surprise stop at little river casino to surpirse my dad as he worked a blackjack table. His table, like many, was empty, so we were able to stay and chat for awhile. . . no hugging, of course, because his hands have to stay in plain sight and can't touch other people (not even a shaking of hands is allowed). I walked into the casino with a dollar in my pocket and left with the same dollar. Pretty impressive! While we were walking around, waiting for dad to get off of his break, we ran into John and Sherry DeBoer. They live in Muskegon and we never run into them here, yet we visit Manistee and there they are! John married us six years ago. He is one of the greatest guys we know.
We then left dad to his bordem and made our way to The Cherry Inn Hotel. It was really windy and as we got close to the hotel we ran a traffic light becasue it was out. We noticed that it was very dark on the bay side of the road. We went to the outskirts of Acme and didn't see our hotle, so we turned around and figured it must have been out of power. In the dark, i was able to make out the sign for the hotle, and we pulled into the dark parking lot. We checked in by flashlight. Apparently the power had gone out 40 minutes ago. The elevators were down so we climbed up the steps to the top story of the hotel, opened our room and it was pitch black. TJ grabbed a flashlight from the stairwell, so i could pee on our toilet. I have never been in such a dark and unfamiliar place. We lit the gas fireplace and opened up our balcony window and listened to the waves. TJ went back downstairs and carried all of our luggage up the stairs. The power came on while he was walking up the stairs, but he didn't want to get stuck in the elevator, so he kept walking. What i loved about it, was our attitudes and the attitudes of the workers. TJ and i didn't let it get us in a bad mood. . . we made jokes and did our best with what we had. It is very typical that something like that would happen to us. When the power came on, it revealed a wonderful room. . . we had a giant soaker/jet tub for at least two people, a fireplace, a sitting area with a view of the bay and a balcony. We even had three tv's. . . one in the bathroom! The relaxing bath was one of my favorite parts. TJ bought sleepy dream bubble bath from bath and body works. That stuff was awesome.
On Saturday, we had a delicious breakfast, shopped on Front Street, and drove around to look at color. We also checked out a new coffee shop and other shops that they are putting in a renovated giant former mental hospital. We ate at the blue tractor. Because my bed time is so early, we headed back home around 6, took a relaxing bath (without the tubside alcohol of course), and then watched Knocked Up.
Today we drove around to North point, then down to Empire and Beulah. That drive was the best drive we have ever been on. The sun was shining, the trees were on fire. The road curved and wound through hills and lakes. We stopped and ate at the Cherry Hut on their last day of being open. We both had a hot turkey sandwich with potatoes and gravy. Then we went between Platte lake and Crystal lake. I asked TJ to turn on Platte drive because it sounded familiar. Then i had him turn on Birch trail and Birch drive and we took the windy, leaf covered road back to my dad's old cabin on Platte Lake. I have so many good memories there. I couldn't believe i was able to find it after 10 years. We pulled into the driveway and all the way to the house (we could tell no one had been there for awhile). TJ laughed as he said, "we better not tell your dad what is hanging in the window." I looked and there was a stained glass Ohio State O. Yikes! I pointed out the beautiful field stone that made-up the fireplace and how the huge windows on the front mimicked the ones on the back, so you could see right through the house to the lake. I pointed out the driftwood address holder at the end of the driveway and the tree i think my dad hit where the bark was scarred. I pointed out the dirt road that veered off to the side where i road on the back of my dad's motorcycle, being very careful not to touch the exhaust with my leg.
On the drive home, we took our time. It was beautiful and relaxing. When we got close to Hart, we both started thinking about all we had to do for school. Then, as we pulled in the driveway, TJ said "screw school! I am working in the garage." He is still in there. I unpacked, started laundry, and picked up. Now i have to get to school work. Tomorrow i have a TAT meeting, a grade-level meeting, a staff meeting after school and recess duty. Tuesday, i am meeting with the lady at central office after school to sign some papers about my leave. Busy. But so glad we took time to get away and spend time with each other. TJ truly is a great companion.

TGIF

Tomorrow, after school, TJ and i are getting away for the weekend. It is greatly needed. he was out of town and then parent teacher conferences. By the time he got home, i was half asleep. I am looking forward to spending a quiet, relaxing weekend with the man i love. I truly enjoy his company. I wish we could leave now. Poor guy is at conferences again. YUCK! And i am getting sleepy. . .

Besides a getaway, tj also seems to need a few days of being at home. He is anxious to start the built-in, but hasn't had any time. The day he took off to work on it, he was sick and wound up doing smaller chores, like blowing out our irrigation and buying me a precious moments. Maybe next weekend. . . less than 160 days until baby ellis could be here!!!! It is going fast.

The newest member of my collection. . .

When i came home from scrapbooking on friday, there was a card and a wrapped present for me. Our anniversary was on Saturday, but knowing we would be out of town on that day, tj thought ahead and got me the best, most fitting card ever and this. . .It is called "together is the nicest place to be." This is a typical night at our house. . .TJ rubbing my head as i go to sleep, remote or another cat in his other hand. Because it is past my bed time, i really cannot even begin to put into words how thankful and happy i am about the last six years and the man i got to spend them with. I am excited as i think of the next six years. i love you, TJ. . . i always will.

I forgot the mention, i totally got TJ a woman's card by accident. It said just what i wanted it to, so i missed the fact that it had a pink peony on the cover, fancy writing on pink paper, and a detachable bookmark with a ribbon! When i had realized what i had done, I was laughing so hard i was crying. I signed it anyway, hoping he would focus so much on the words that he would be oblivious to the fact that it was made for a woman!! Ya, he wasn't oblivious. . .really how could you be, unless you had baby brain.

Grocery Shopping

I was going to go grocery shopping yesterday after school, but just didn't have the energy. I barely did today, but i managed it. TJ is in traverse city, so i went alone. Some of you are probably thinking "i always go alone." Well, i don't. Since we have been married we go shopping together, until recently. TJ has been going alone because i couldn't stomach it or have the energy.

Today my cart was such a mess without TJ compulsively putting everything in its place. In single life, i would have never noticed what a chaotic mess my cart was, but after grocery shopping with the man for over 6 years, i am able to see my weakness in cart organization. Notice, i am only able to see it, not fix it. I love that TJ has rubbed off on me. Before i even entered the store i wrote most of my check out because i can never handle loading, writing, and bagging at the same time.

When i arrived home and unloaded the car, i noticed another TJism that i have picked up. I took everything out of the bag and set it on the counter. I used to laugh at tj for doing this, thinking why touch an item twice. . . just take it out of the bag and put it away. I did it. I caught myself when i had already emptied four bags onto the counter. I touched each item twice!

After unloading, i realized that the cashier gave me back my check after it had been run through the register. I don't think he was supposed to do that and i didn't notice until i got home because it was in a pile with the receipt and coupons. I should probably run back up there. . . no way!

TJ will be gone at the conference and then parent/teacher conferences for the rest of the week, so dinners are up to me. I immediately resorted to my single days filled with pasta roni, rice-a-roni, and nachos. I am pathetic!

Most of all, i realized just how much i look forward to seeing tj after work. On a cold and rainy day i want to cuddle and eat some of his chili or soup. I am sure some of you are rolling your eyes. I am just not used to tj being gone. I know i will make it. i always do.

I dragged myself home today

I am tired. Tired from the weekend. Tired from the lack of sleep i have gotten recently. Tired from doing curriculum work today. I am tired. My plan was to grocery shop on my way home today. impossible. Instead, i came home and saved energy for cleaning up the kitchen, unpacking from the weekend, and correcting papers. I just need to sleep. TJ leaves for a conference in traverse city tomorrow for two days.

Despite being tiring, my weekend was wonderful. I have missed my family dearly. We got to hang out with matt, lori, trevor, steve, gail, dad, granna, and aunt carol. We also got to talk to jason, which was great. I really miss my brothers. i didn't get enough dad time, so we are going to meet for dinner later. We didn't get into town until 11:30 ish. . . way past my bed time and i was unable to fall asleep in the car. Then i was up late (okay late for me) on Saturday trying to visit with people when i was half asleep. Then we didn't get home until 8 yesterday. I am tired. Did i mention that i am tired??! AND we are going out of town on Friday, again!

Good News

My union person met with our central office person to discuss my wanting to take the rest of the year after the birth of baby ellis as a leave and to take all of next year as a leave. We met today during my planning. Both union people i talked to were a little concerned because the contract states a year from birth will be granted, which means i would have to come back to work in April of next year for nine weeks. Well, the central office person interprets the contract differently, but in a good way for me. She says that i get my 12 weeks and then my child care leave would kick in for a year from that date. So, i am good until June or August. . .depending on which schedule we go with.

I am so relieved. He said that there still could be some problems up ahead, but he didn't foresee any.

Sunday's List

Balance Checkbook
Pay Bills
Laundry
Empty Dishwasher
Make Loopies
Read MEAP Assessment Book
Correct Papers
Cut out Pattern for Bumper
Sew TJ's Shirt

I got a lot done on my list early this morning. Then i took a nap and have been dragging ever since. It is going to be a busy week. Tomorrow i have recess duty, grade level meeting and a staff meeting. Tuesday the MEAP starts, i have library :( and i am getting my hairs cut. Wednesday we have a doctor's appointment for Baby Ellis and then on Friday i am either scrapbooking or going out of town. The week is going to fly by. Time is flying by. . .i get the feeling that March is going to be here before i know it and i am starting to freak out about all that needs to be done, purchased, and all the changes that are going to occur between now and then. Exciting, but scary!

Yum. . .

This morning, after getting to work, i had a huge urge for grape soda. I almost went out three times to get some, but then my friend came into my classroom and i could tell she had been crying. We talked for about 40 minutes. Grape soda got put on hold. Friends come first. TJ picked me up some on his way home. I am just finishing it now. Yum. I also just finished a big bowl of buttered noodles covered in pepper and Parmesan cheese. Double yum. Now i am going to satisfy my sweet tooth with a TJ bar cookie fresh from the oven. The man is good.I corrected a pile of bar graphs and tally charts my kids made last week. The pile has been haunting me. Every graph is different and there is so much to look for. . . it took more brain power than i have had lately. I was hoping to get a lot more done, but i am unmotivated right now and it is bed time. Tomorrow is a new day, with a few more papers.

Happy Birthday, Mom.

Today my mom would have turned 60. I am actually not going to write a big, long post about her. For right now, i feel emotionally drained, especially after reading TJ's memories. I, instead am going to show you two pictures i received in the mail today from my aunt and granna. They are from my mom's birthday in 1978. I am four months old. Notice Jered's face in the one picture. . . i am sure it is because he has to hold me. It is odd for me to see her wedding ring on her finger. I don't have a memory of her wearing it, but i have seen it in her jewelry box so many times that i definitely recognize it. Also, check out my dad in the background looking so hip in his shiny shirt as he looks at his family. I almost enjoy the background of pictures just as much as the foreground.

Tomorrow i am going to school. . .

and it is October first. I have not gone to school on October first in four years, ever since my mom passed away. October first was her birthday and i would stay home to celebrate her life and cry about her passing. I know it sounds weird. It was just something i needed to do. Last year it fell on a weekend. This year, i don't have the sick days and i think i will be alright.
In previous years, i would

• Paint my toe nails (she loved having her toenails painted and always thought i should)
• Watch My So Called Life (this was our favorite show)
• Watch our wedding video (to hear her voice)
• Look through photo albums
• Take a nap
• Cry
• Blog

This year i will be surrounded by students and adults. Really no chance to cry. I do think that i will be alright. I will definitely live my day with many many memories going through my head of her. They will make me smile. Maybe i will cry when i get home. Either way, i am going to school tomorrow.

New Pictures

My dad got me a furby when i was younger. I had it when i lived with Sarah. We both found it kind of creepy, but funny. When we moved, i hid it in some boxes she was taking with her. I guess the bumps in the road made it turn on and talk the whole way to her new place. She finally disassembled it and apparently kept the eyeballs! I still have a picture of furby that i keep tucked in a kitchen cupboard door. . . it makes me smile every time i open it!

Corbin with Furby's eyes! CREEPY!

Aren't they adorable!!

Weekend

Last night, i stayed out later than i have in months. . . which is why i think i am taking a nap in a few minutes. We went out to eat with Kathleen and Rich before heading over to the Frauenthal for the opening season of the symphony. Rob and Kim have season tickets, but were not able to go last night, so we got to go. It was spectacular. The pianist was my favorite. I was absolutely mesmerized by his hands, his talent, and his odd quirks. I must admit, however, that i was excited to go to bed, too. Waking up at 5:15 and staying up until 10:30 about did me in, but i am so glad we went.

This morning we woke up and headed to gary's in Montague for some breakfast. We then went to Octoberfest and bought two mums, a huge sweatshirt for super cheap for when i am really big and just want something cozy to wear, and we of course looked at all the pumpkins and apples. Yum. Now TJ is going to mow the lawn, clean out the gutters, and build a built-in. I am going to take a nap and then clean. Right now, i am chilly and tired and i just want to crawl into bed!

Our Typical Annie

This is what Annie looks like most of the day. . .
Napping.
Drooling. . . profusely.
Tongue hanging out.
Looking unintelligent or drunk.
Stinking.
She has problems.
We still love her.
Most of the time.If you look closely, you can see the string of drool coming from her tongue.

Paying Bills

This morning, in between blowing my nose, i paid bills and balanced the checkbook. The checkbook balanced to the cent in a matter seconds. What a great beginning to the day! I am such a dork. I am starting to get a little worried about finances, and i should be. Many of you know that i am not planning on working next year and i am taking unpaid leave at the end of this year. Money will be tight. I am a firm believer though, that you spend what you have. When tj and i were first married, i worked at hallmark and he went to school. It was tight, but we made it. Our mortgage is about 2 hundred more than our rent was at the time and we do have other expenses that we have added to our lives. . . some we can take away, some will stay. I guess i am not used to being so worried about finances. My check has been going into savings for the last three years, transferring some out as needed. But next year, there won't be that option or as much of the savings. I know this is what God wants us to do though. He will provide, and we will make the necessary changes. We realize a family trip to Disney or the latest clothes and gadgets will not be a part of our lives, and we are alright with that.

The scary thing is, i can only take a year leave from the date of the birth of our child, which means if the board does not grant me more time than they have to, i will likely have to resign. That scares me. Teaching jobs are so hard to get these days. TJ wants to take a leave the following year, while i go back and teach. If the board doesn't grant me what i am asking for, that plan will not work. We will have to see. So much to think about.

I remember my mom living from pay check to pay check, almost like a juggling act. She was pretty talented at juggling. Hopefully, she passed on some of that talent. Even if i continued to work, things would be tight with having to pay for day care. No matter what, we are having a baby and babies cost money. I cannot wait!!!

Today is a day of school work and laundry. I either have a cold or allergies. Yesterday, i think i was running a fever, but today i just feel completely stuffed and my eyes are watering, which makes me think allergies. Anyway, i better go put the next load into the washer. I feel more at peace about finances now that i wrote about it. Blogs are good for that.

Thankfulness

This morning, as i am driving to school, i was overcome with thankfulness. All these things, events, people, flooded my mind and my heart. The family i was born into. The family i married into. My husband. Our jobs. Being pregnant. Being a mother soon. countless and countless more. It started my day off right, a little teary eyed, but right.

It amazes me how when your day starts off good, it just gets better. Bad or annoying things are easier to brush off. Good things seem to find you, or maybe you find the good things. All the smiles and good, just make the good even better. That is how today was. That was my morning.

i was able to brush off when i knelt down to help a student and midway into our conversation he wiped his nose on his sleeve and made a string of snot, a rope really, stretching from his sleeve up to his face. It was disgusting. Yet, it was all the good things that stick out. All the little things that made me laugh or made me smile. All my thankful thoughts played over and over again in my mind. And as i went through the day, more were added. Good thoughts were attracting good thoughts. I look around, and i am so overcome again with thankfulness. It was like a list to God of all the things and people that i never want to take for granted, that i want to thank Him for creating and placing strategically and purposefully into my life, for making our paths cross and intertwine.

Used to

I used to get to school at 7.
Now i get to school at 6:30.
I used to get home around 4.
Now i am lucky if i get home by 5.
I used to be able to correct papers when i got home.
Now i eat, clean up and go to bed.
Something has got to change.
I used to not be pregnant.
Now i am pregnant!
I used to stay up until 10.
Now i go go bed at 8.
Life used to be and is good.

Fellow Parade of Home Goers-

You must check out house/condo number 20 and you must wear blue. . . also don't forget to check out their advertised "enter net alcove"

Just in case you hadn't noticed my links

TJ has a blog. . . and so does baby ellis.

Fall Fun

i love fall. We just returned from the farmer's market. . . yum, fresh tomatoes and apples and nectarines. Then we went to a breakfast dive and had a tasty breakfast. Then on to meijers (yuck) and now we are going to some parade homes. It is a cool crisp sunny fall day. Oh, and we stopped at a hallmark store. I really wanted this precious moments and i couldn't find her anywhere else. Since i am now in my second trimester, i thought i would finally get her. There are a lot of precious moments to celebrate pregnancy, but this one seemed appropriate to buy for myself and seemed appropriate for our situation. I used loopie money to buy her and she is making me smile. Her title is "The Good Lord Always Delivers" and she is holding a book of baby names. Awe....how cute. I know some people reading this feel like vomiting right about now.

Kids? Pregnancy? or Both?

I don't know if it is my group of students this year, or my hormones or a combination, but i am getting so irritated with my kids. Other third grade teachers are saying the same things, but one is also pregnant. The kids do not listen or follow directions. I model what i am asking them to do. I say the directions verbally as well as write them on the board. I have them discuss what they are going to do next with the kids at their table. I ask "are there any questions someone might have? No questions. Then, i set them free and i have a ton of kids come up to me saying, "i forgot what we are supposed to do" or "what do we do" or " i don't get it" or "teacher, teacher". AAHHHHH! The "teacher. teacher" has got to stop. . . they are in third grade and my name is easy to pronounce.

During direct math instruction about pictographs, i had to tell two students for the second time that day to put their Captain Underpants books away. I love reading and i am glad for their enthusiasm, but sometimes you have to do what you don't necessarily want to.

Thankfully, other teachers feel the same way. Thankfully i have planning tomorrow, unlike today. Thankfully i am pregnant. . . i am just so happy about that. Thankfully i have a job that, for the most, part i love.

I guess i need to pray for patience. I have noticed since being pregnant that my road rage has increased and i often find myself bothered by inanimate objects. These are kids. . . kids who see me for seven hours out of their day. I have so much responsibility, so (too) much influence and power. It creeps me out. I need to have patience. All teachers need it. . . even the pregnant ones. Please pray for us.

Breaking the Silence

One can tell school has started. . . silence from my blogs. I was in bed by eight every night, after getting home at 5 or 6. I was/am so tired, but i made it through the first sweltering week.

My students seem like a nice bunch of kids. There are already two that are driving me nuts, but i am sure it is hormonal. One poor boy keeps crying. I feel so bad for him. He has some anxiety issues and can't keep it together. Once he was crying because he rode his scooter to school and it looked like it was going to rain. He just could not get it together enough to tell me. It was impossible to understand. When i finally figured out what he was talking about, we promptly called his mom to have her pick him up. Then he started freaking out thinking that she was only coming if it was raining and he wanted her to come no matter what. Another call home was made because he could not calm down. He couldn't even talk to her to get words out. Crazy.

I am looking forward to sleeping in, at least not hearing my alarm sound. I will sleep past 5:15 tomorrow and i am kind of excited. I think i am going to go eat some crispy crowns, olives, and muenster cheese. Dinner here i come!

A Wonderful Ending

Since tomorrow TJ and i will both be working on school things, today was the last official day of summer for us. And what a wonderful ending it was. This weekend, with our getaway, was just what we needed. We finished off the weekend with me sewing inside as i listened to the hum of wordworking tools in the garage. TJ played around and tested his leigh dovetail jig as i wore out the tips of my fingertips with putting in and taking out pins in fabric. We also cleaned a bit inside and in the garage and finished some odds and end jobs. I got tired so suddenly that i had to stop a sewing project when i was almost at the end. I just couldn't go on. However, i do think i am beginning to get some of my energy back. . . i didn't nap today and i worked until 8:45. Hooray! Just in time for school.

I also ate mashed potatoes that my loving husband made me. YUM! I am ready to settle on the couch as TJ, surrounded by cats, reads his book. Sounds nice. Most Sundays won't be like this anymore. . .

Relaxed and Rejuvenated

We just got back from our last summer celebration. It was perfect. . . just what we both needed. I feel completely relaxed and rejuvenated, especially compared to when we left. We shopped a ton in GR. I got some maternity clothes for school, a snoogle body pillow, thank you cards for all the baby gifts baby ellis has already received, and some other things. We ate out a ton (one place i took one bite and had to get it out of my view). I did have the best cinnamon french toast, though at a place called Sundance. We took a walk around our huge hotel and on the sky walk and then we took a walk along the river. Then we had more errands to run. I told TJ that i didn't want to go back home and empty the dishwasher and pay bills, so he took me to a movie. Bourne Ultimatum was excellent. Now i am home, and it is too late to do my chores, so i guess i will go to bed soon. What a perfect plan. It was absolutely wonderful. We needed that. We just enjoyed each other's company, held hands walking down the sidewalk, laughed together, dreamed about baby ellis, and enjoyed the fresh air and sunshine. I did burst out in tears when i saw two kids that were in the backseat of a hot car, left alone by their mom shopping in the mall. The security guy was questioning the older girl. The other child was crying and in a rear facing car seat. I never appreciated those security guys as much as i did then.

Coming Home

I couldn't get home soon enough today. I was destined for a nap. I was upset, overwhelmed, stressed, angry, and tired. Two days full of meetings. Today's meeting were just about a lot of change. . . change in documenting teacher absences, change in our grading program, change in curriculum, change in the principal's expectations. If you know me at all, you know i am not good with change when it is just dumped on me, with no time to plan for it and no time to reflect on it before responding. I cried when i got home, especially after talking to the rudest person at our credit union. I just needed to cry. I don't know if it is the hormones or my day or both, but it felt good. I am trying to stay relaxed, but there is so much pressure right now. I have such high expectations for teaching my students, sometimes very unrealistic, but i feel like i am made to feel constantly inadequate, unsupported, and unappreciated at times. Instead of being shown the good things we are doing, we are always shown the negative or the things that need to be changed. Nothing stays the same really. I know it is important to be constantly challenging yourself and constantly becoming better teachers, but this is ridiculous.

When TJ got home, he asked what was wrong and i could tell he genuinely wanted to know. i rambled on and on while crying about all the stupid things, changes, and expectations. He listened and hugged. He didn't try to fix or try to make me see it from another perspective. He just listened and hugged. It was just what i needed. I am still overwhelmed. Maybe because i have all these changes in my head, all of these outside pressures and without having my students in the classroom. . . it seems all for nothing. Maybe i will feel better when i actually get to start my job and teach. TEACH. Not filling out stupid monday morning reports, or documenting my positive parent contacts. Not making sure i am teaching the exact same thing my colleagues are at the exact same time or attending grade level meetings to discuss our ever changing curriculum. Not entering grades in a huge database that i don't find useful, or filling out 9 pieces of paper to attend one conference. When the kids come, i will see each of them for who they are and all this other junk will slip to the back of my mind. I will again see my calling. . . to TEACH. It is not the kids that are burning me out. It is all the other junk.- The negativity, the never satisfied administration, the aiming for a moving target, the jumping on the latest band wagon, the last minute changes and delivery, the miscommunication, the gingerbread molds.

TJ took me out to City Cafe. All i wanted to do was sleep, but i could tell he really wanted to eat out and it did sound good to get out and talk about other things. I just had to wait for my puffy eyes to settle down before we could go. Now i am going to bed. I had a long day yesterday and what seemed an even longer day today. I am low on sleep, energy and patience.

Tomorrow we are hanging out in GR and then we are staying at the amway grand for our last little get away and probably eat at Bistro Belle Vista. We are going to do some shopping, some spending, some relaxing, some connecting, and some laughing. Just what i need. When we get back, reality will set in and we will both get less sleep, worry more, and do the best job we can do at teaching our students.

Here we go!

Tomorrow is a day full of meetings, sitting, listening, explaining, snacking, and other energy sucking things. We also have open house, which is almost a week from when school actually starts. I will put on a smile, walk around, greet, talk, try to remember names, explain things, . . . and then come home and completely crash. I haven't gotten up at 6 and had to go go go in a long time, and i have never done it pregnant. I am pregnant (gosh, i love the sound of that)!!!! New experience, new year, new craziness!

I had a wonderful summer. Full of reading spelling articles to become master lindsey (which i successfully signed my teaching contract stating so), helping tj with the gardens, getting pregnant, sewing, reading, visiting with friends and family, relaxing, and enjoying life. Good bye summer. Next summer will definitely be different. . . in a good and busy way! I cannot wait.

Sewing

In spite of how exhausted i felt, i unlatched my beautiful wooden sewing box and began cutting fabric and ribbon. I cut a stack of fabric last week, but wanted to cut a little more. I then proceeded to make five Loopies by Lindsey. I love sewing. I love my sewing box that my father-in-law made special for me. I love how easy and cooperative my machine runs. There is nothing like a machine that actually runs correctly, has hassle free tension, and is user friendly if there is a slight problem - like having to change my needle. I love seeing my effort turned into something cute and cuddly.

The thing that i love most about making my loopies, is the feeling of accomplishment and pride. I am pretty impressed with myself. I stepped out of my comfort zone. I bought a taggie blanket a year ago and paid way more than i thought i should have and thought to myself "i could probably make this." A week later i was making a prototype and asking people what they thought. I tweeked some things and then started cranking them out. That was a year ago. So far i have sold close to 60, made two giant ones for charities, and given them as gifts to many friends.

I love hearing that so many of the people that have bought them for their kids are so incredibly pleased with them. I hear things like their kid can't go to bed without it, their kid has to have one in their crib and in the car, they carry it with them wherever they go. I have even seen them in pictures of my friend's family get togethers. One of my friends buys them for all her nieces and nephews and now her sister, whom i have never met, needs three of them to give as gifts as well.

Although i didn't invent the idea of having ribbon sewn in loops around a small blanket, i have found a way to make them with better fabric, more of a variety of ribbon, and for cheaper. That makes me happy. I was just told on Friday by a friend whose daughter has one that he saw them at a craft show and they were not nearly as nice as the ones i make. Yeah, i am tired, but i actually feel like i did something with my day. . . something i enjoy, something that gives me some spending money, and something that makes babies and toddlers smile.

Yum!

TJ called me at work today to tell me that he was going over to a friend's house to help out for awhile. He also delivered the message to me that there was one piece of Texas sheet cake left and it was mine. What a wonderful husband. I savored the cake, as i am watching Oprah talk about heart disease being the leading killer among women and how eating right can help. It was wonderful cake. i know i need to take better care of myself, especially my heart. I want to be around for my family. . . I want to be there for my grandkids.

I won't be into work for the rest of the week. We are going to visit dad tomorrow. I can't wait to see him and his projects. And then Thursday and Friday i have boring conferences i am signed up to go to. i am in pretty good shape in my classroom for open house, but i am not even close with the important stuff, like plans and schedules. I have another new boss this year. I am tired of getting a new principal every two years, and this new guy doesn't know anything about elementary or special ed! It is scary. he is a real nice guy, but it is still very frightening and exhausting.

I have a bunch of stuff i am supposed to read for these conferences, so i better get going. i should also probably clean the texas sheet cake pan, since TJ made the cake and let me have the last piece.

I am good!

I know i haven't posted in awhile, and i don't want people to worry. I am doing good. . . just tired and a wee bit busy. I have been going into school, watching baby Corbin, hanging out with friends, sleeping, napping, dozing, and smiling. Life is good. I am doing stuff for school this weekend and hopefully making a load of loopies by lindsey. I have an order for three of them and then i want a full basket when school starts. I need to get rid of the mound of fabric in the nursery closet.

I know i've said this before

I cannot believe how incredibly tired i am. Today, when we got back from church, i had the feeling like it wasn't a choice if i took a nap or not. I had to. I lay down on the couch and within minutes i was fast asleep, nothing would disturb me. Now that i am "awake" i feel like the walking dead. My eyes are stinging. I feel drugged. I am floating around trying to get things done, but i can't think straight and i feel so tired. I tried balancing the checkbook and for the first time in ages i am 27 cents off. I was not in the right frame of mind to figure it out. So i decided to water plants and dust the ceiling fans and blinds. I locked myself out of our front door because i am so out of it. I got in through the garage. I hope this gets better.

Pasta a la Caprese

Since my mom passed away in February of 2003, i have had her signature dish, pasta a la caprese, once. A few years ago, tj and i ventured up to my aunt's condo in the UP right on lake michigan. Both my aunt sharon and my aunt andrea made it for us.

Today, i made it. I have been wanting it and have been reminded of it often as the framed recipe, written in my mom's handwriting and stained with olive oil sits on my kitchen shelves by the sink. A precious gift from my big brother jered. I bought tomatoes from the farmers market. They looked and smelled perfect. As i made it, i found that my mom went away from the recipe a bit. Thanks to memories i am making it the true mom way. The recipe doesn't mention anything about seeding the tomatoes, but i distinctly remember her doing it. It made her hands hurt to run them under cold water for so long, so i normally took over for her. The recipe also mentions 20 fresh basil leaves, but i distinctly remember her shaking the McCormick dried basil leaves over the tomato concoction and having me taste it as she went to see if it needed more. The biggest difference would have to be the peppers. It calls for one fresh mild pepper cut into strips. My mom NEVER did that. She bought the banana peppers in a jar and cut those up. The only problem is is that i don't remember exactly how much, so i guessed and looked to see if the concoction looked and tasted familiar. I remember having to go back and get that jar of peppers once or twice in my life because my mom forgot to grab them in the isle. They are always by the pickles.

Now, the tomatoes, garlic, peppers, ground pepper, oil, salt, and basil are sitting in the plastic container covered by the lid. In a bit, i will uncover the bowl and take a little taste, add what it is missing, stir it and cover it again. Then repeat. Unfortunately i do not have it sitting in an avocado green Tupperware dish, like my mom, but i think my container will do just fine.

After it sits and when TJ and i get hungry we will make ziti pasta and add a ton of mozzarella cheese and dump the tomato concoction on the noodles and have ourselves some pasta a la caprese, mom style. Now i see why my mom always doubled the recipe, even though seeding 8 tomatoes got a little tedious. . . you definitely want left overs with this dish. It is one of those meals that are actually better when you warm it up. Here's to you mom. I wish you could come over for a little summer pasta treat, sit at our kitchen table, see our home, and discuss exciting baby things.

And so it begins

The school nightmares have started. The ones where it is the first day of school and the students are filing in with no end in sight. I don't have enough seats. I can't find the breakfast sheet. I have the wrong class list, which means their lockers, seats, mailboxes, and basically everything has the wrong names on them. Paper is hanging off the bulletin boards and i still have boxes of my stuff packed up. I can't even find a pen.

I have been in to school twice already. On wednesday, TJ came and helped tremendously. He moved all my furniture, hooked up all my computers, and actually has the capabilities to picture spatial things. I went in today to do bulletin boards and roam around thinking of all that i have to do. i do feel refreshed this year. Not teaching summer school was the best decision i have ever made, aside from saying yes to my boyfriend at the time question to marry him. That by far was my best decision.

I have already bought 60 some folders, colored pencils, a new tub, glue sticks, pencils, and notebooks.

I decided that i still have so much i can do at home in the air conditioning to prepare for school. I have two books i have to read by August 24th and i have books that i wanted to read during the summer for methods of teaching reading and writing. I have a ton of documents to create on the computer and a couple of posters to make. I am a little overwhelmed, but it will all work out.

Exciting Day!

I was reminded that i again had a monday off. I normally hate mondays. Today, we had our ultrasound (click here for a super cool summary), went to see Harry Potter on 3D IMAX, and bought baby ellis a crib.
I am exhausted. My stomach just doesn't feel normal, but again. . . i am alright with that because i am after all making a person. I don't want to eat anything. When i do eat, it is things like strawberry smoothies, strawberry mentos, or rainbow sherbet. Those just aren't nutritionally sound things for a growing baby, but i am confident that i will get my appetite back soon enough to provide some sustanace. If i try to eat better now, i will just throw it up anyway.

Harry Potter was amazing. And all i had to do was sit and watch. I am still exhausted. I came home and slept for an hour and now i am just waiting till it's time to go to bed, so i can sleep some more!

Local mothers. . . i need your help!

Tomorrow, I graduate from my reproductive endocrinologist in Grand Rapids, which means i now need to find an ob/gyn. As many of you know, i was not crazy about the one who referred me to the GR office. What i would like from you is comments on who was your doctor during your pregnancy and delivery and what you liked about him/her. Also, share what or who you didn't like. Of course, try to think of the appointments as well as delivery and discharge. Even if you told me before, i got everything jumbled in my head, so i would appreciate opinions again. Also, if you happen to work with any doctors (you know who you are!) i would greatly appreciate any input! Instead of just picking a random name, i would like to be somewhat educated. Thanks!!!

So Good to be Home

I get so excited when we pull into our driveway after being gone for just a weekend. I start thinking about our cats around Lansing and make little meowing noises. By Grand Rapids, i get really antsy. I don't know what it is, but i love this side of our state. I love the trees and wild life. I love the lack of traffic. I enjoy going to the farmer's market and knowing the farmers. I love how quiet it seems. And i truly love our home. I find peace on the couch and solitude in its quietness. I love petting our kitties and sleeping in our bed. I love looking at our flowers and reading the Chronicle, no matter how lame it is. I love the color on our walls and the soft carpet under my feet. I love our furniture. I love thinking about future dreams/plans of finishing the basement and putting in a pond. I love my washer and dryer and our tile floor. I like our windows and wood trim. I love our rounded corners of our walls and our hard wood floors. I love looking around and feeling so blessed and gazing at pictures and feeling so loved.

i especially have come to love the life we have over here. Don't get me wrong, family is wonderful. i just feel like this side of the state is for me. . . it is where i fit. It is where i got my education, where i started to choose to go to church on my own, where we got married, where we bought our first house, where we got our first jobs, where are friends are, where my older brother lives and closer to my dad. Where we fit in. We see Muskegon's potential and we are not far from the city of Grand Rapids. We can go to the most beautiful lake and sand dunes and be there in minutes or we can travel a little north and feel like we are on vacation. This is where i belong. This is where we will raise our child. This is home.

Call me Master Lindsey

Just kidding! Yesterday, I met with my professor and then walked over the blue bridge like a right of passage to kinkos to have three copies of my thesis bound. Thirty dollars and two hours later, i was holding a 101 page book that i had worked three months on. Hooray! I was finally done. My prof said that she got 8 copies of hers made. She passed them out like people wanted to read them or something. I wonder if she even autographed them! I just got one for myself because it is actually a pretty boring, repetitive read, but i am done!!!!

We are at gail's for the weekend to visit and celebrate matt's and Steve's birthday. I think we may go to costco today, too. On Sunday we are going to see my granna and aunt carol.

I gust wanted to right about my grate acomplishment of finishing my thesis on speling. (Ha Ha)!

Pictures

I finally downloaded some pictures. Here is what we have been up to. . .Thanks to my dad's power washer, we got the mold and grayness off of our porch and deck. I am glad TJ didn't rip his barefoot open.

Then, a fresh coat of stain went on the deck and porch. He also stained the front boards that he just installed. And we got hostas from matt for $3.00

The starrs came over for some scrapbooking, air conditioning, dinner, and Last Comic Standing. Corbin fell alseep during the show. . .i almost did.

While Sarah and i were scrapbooking and Nate was taking a placement test, TJ read Rendezvous with Rama to Corbin. He seemed so interested in the story.

Baby Ellis Blog

Awhile ago, TJ started a new blog for the future addition to our family. I won't double blog anymore, now that it will be public. Check it out here.

Nauseated

Today the developing Baby Ellis is making me feel quite nauseated, but it is by far the best nausea i have ever had. . . because there is a purpose, and an exciting reason. I am so thankful that i get to experience this miracle called pregnancy. I love feeling tired, nauseated, bloated, gassy, and hungry. I love peeing four times during the night and being reminded that Baby Ellis is growing inside of me. I know i am weird, but i am enjoying every miserable moment of pregnancy so far.

200th post brings good news

My chapter three got approved. She wrote that i was good to go. I meet with her on Friday armed with my hard copy. At that time, she is only going to look at formatting. In order for it to be bound correctly, it has weird margins and the title page needs to be visible through the window on the cover. After meeting with her, i walk from her office right across the blue bridge that goes over the river right into kinkos doors and request it copied and bound x3. I cannot tell you how much relief i feel right now.

I just took all the stuff from shucking the corn to the compost pile on the edge of our woods. And i scared 4 chickens. Where did those guys come from?? I think TJ got them and just never told me. He has always wanted chickens. I guess that gives me the right to get me a pygmy goat! Yee Haw!

Tomorrow, i think i am going to go shopping for bigger clothes and weed the back garden. TJ is staining the back deck right now, but tomorrow he has a meeting at school he has to go to. i need to shop and i am not going to be upset about my big size because, after all, i am pregnant (man, i love the sound of that) and have huge cysts in me. I haven't gained a pound since i stopped my injections, but i have put on a lot of weight because of my injections. I can't fit into any of my pants. Today, i brought up my fat bin, took the clothes out, and replaced them with my "skinny" clothes- not that i was ever skinny, but i was much smaller than i am now.

So, i just looked over at Annie, my drooling cat. And she was sitting on the coffee table licking her paw. . . like how she does it when she is sitting up on my fish tank after she has put her paw in the water. I watch a little longer and i saw her insert her paw nearly to the bottom of my tall glass of pure water, remover her paw and lick it again. Then she repeated this three more times before moving on. Gross. I guess i am getting a new glass of fresh water and i will never leave it on the coffee table out of my sight again.

Terrible thesis

I am so exhausted from thinking about my thesis. I am tired of having it hang over my head as i am looking at cribs with TJ. I am tired of worrying about it when i am sipping my lemonade at Panera bread. I am tired of dreading working on it when i wake up on beautiful Sunday morning. Soon, it will be done. I finally heard back from her after sending my prof the first part of my chapter three. She said i was very, very much on track. And that i needed to remember to cite the literature again, even though it might seem tedious and repetitive. This whole thing is quit repetitive. I just want to finish it. I also sent my prof all of chapter three and i have not heard anything from her. So, today, i am just going to go through it (AGAIN) and add citations and literature (AGAIN) and call it good. I think. Until i hear from her, that is. August first is quickly approaching and she needs a hard copy by then. We have been submitting things electronically, so i don't know if i am supposed to hand deliver a hard copy to review together or mail a hard copy (which would cost a ton). Yikes!

I am glad i have fresh corn to eat today and beautiful glads TJ got me at the farmer's market yesterday. I put them right in front of my working spot to make me smile. Oh yeah, and i have my very own pint of Ben and Jerry Chubby Hubba ice cream. What a tasty treat.

Chubby Hubby

I am not calling my hubby chubby. In fact as i write this, he is downstairs exercising. I am writing about the Ben and Jerry ice cream that we got last night at Meijer. We needed an ice cream run. I, of course, got my mint cookie and tj went for something new to him. . . Chubby Hubby. This ice cream is unbelievable . It has Fudge covered pretzels that are peanut butter filled in vanilla malt ice cream with swirls of fudge and peanut butter. Wow. i have a new favorite.

When we were standing in line at meijer, there was a guy behind us who was buying 6 big bottles of resolve carpet cleaner. He was on his cell telling the person on the other end that he was still two short. i was dying to ask, but i didn't.

I can grow people

I went for my first ultrasound today that involved looking at something other than my ovaries and lining. . . we were in search of a human growing. And the little human, only measuring .13cm, was found in a healthy gestational sac. Due date: March 25, 2008. The Dr. gave us a congrats card with a picture of our ultrasound. The only thing is - i have many large cysts on my ovaries. That explains why my clothes don't fit and why it hurts to bend. He said to take it easy and that it is normal for the shots i was on. We go back in two weeks and then we will "graduate" from there. We were so relieved that everything is healthy. We both didn't sleep well last night due to wondering if bad news was coming our way. . .and my thesis.

Last night, at about 8:30 i looked on my e-mail to find a message from my prof to call her at home about my chapter 3. Ya, not good. It is a mess. She says it just needs some tweaking, but it is a mess. In fact, before hanging up at around 9, she asked me if i could send her some of the new pages in the next couple hours. I told her no. I was exhausted and half asleep already. Then i went on to tell her that i was going to be out of town all day today. I have some work ahead of me. Pray for me.

Today was nice. After the DR. we went and ate breakfast with Jered as we discussed the Harry potter books and movies, pictures on the wall, and deep concepts. Then TJ and i headed went shopping (I am getting way too familiar with public restroom. . . i have to pee all the time), and met gail and lori. I am so lucky to marry into such an incredible family. Families are so cool. It was wonderful to see them. Again, it makes me wish we lived closer.

Well, since i got to sleep late last night and didn't sleep at all from 2:45- 5:00, i am going to bed now. Good night.

Unsuccessful Chapter 3

Yuck. My prof got back to me and my chapter three needs to be fixed. . . a lot i think. I thought i was so close to being done. Guess i was wrong. I worked three more hours on it. We will see if i am going in the right direction, or further in the wrong. She said i was relying too much on my appendices to describe my project. My appendices are made up of tables upon tables of words sorted by patterns and features. How do i not rely on those to describe it? Oh well. I will see what she says with the revision. Yuck. I want to be done. . .so that there is time when i don't have to think about my thesis or school. That won't happen. I already had my first back to school dream. Oh well. At least i get to have fun in GR tomorrow.

Marvelous Monday

Today is marvelous. Because i am not at school. I am trying to remind myself of that this summer. It was easy to remember when i took a nap today at 1:00. It is easy to take for granted. I always hated Mondays. . . staff meetings, recess duty, waking up early again. Freedom for a little bit longer. I sent away chapter 3 to my prof today. When it is okayed i need to do the table of contents, abstract, title page and go to kinko's to get two copies bound. I am almost done!

TJ has been staining all day. Our porch is looking beautiful and fresh. The railing looked tedious to get done. I am staying away from the fumes. Because i am pregnant. I like to say that.

We got our first "congratulations on your pregnancy" gift. It is a baby Einstein video that has classical music. How exciting! Our ultrasound got switched to 8:00 tomorrow. Which means waking up extremely early and hanging out the Whole day in GR. Not bad. I just hope we don't spend a lot of money. . .that is easy to do when we are shopping all day. We might go see Harry Potter on the imax screen or to Frederick meijers gardens. Then we are meeting gail and lori for dinner. Another tasty treat!

Well, i am going to clean some fresh, first picking yellow beans that we got at the farmer's market. YUM!

I Finished

I read Harry potter all yesterday (TJ got it after i fell asleep and stayed up until 3) and i read it for a good chunk of the day. . . besides making a loopie, eating and going to a birthday party. What a downer. . . there will never be a Harry Potter book written again. Will she continue to write other books? Will she have considered herself accomplished enough to never publish anything else? What makes me really sad is that all those main characters really seem real. She writes with such clarity and detail that you actually feel like you know them. It is sad.

I wish i was writing to say that i am done with my thesis. It is due August 1st and i am close. Tomorrow, i am going to proofread all 88 pages (most of that has already been read and proofread my prof), do my table of contents and insert my references. TJ saved the day again of Friday by setting up my Appendix header. My patience was wearing thin. Then Tuesday, we go for my first ultrasound where i actually have something growing in me!! It just doesn't seem as bad to have something inserted up you, when there is something growing in me that they want to check. Hooray! Then TJ and i get to shop in GR for a bit and then meet gail and lori for a bite to eat. Lori was in a triathlon today. . . i am dying to know how it went.

TJ is reading. He was so patiently waiting for me to either succumb to sleepiness or to finish, so he could continue the potter tale. Good night.

A New Addition?

So, TJ and i are in charge of feeding my friends' cats while they are in the UP. We love their cats and they live close, so it is not a big deal at all. When we get there, Ramona was quick to hop off the window ledge and say hello. Then Amelia came and Meowed at us. While we were putting food in the bowls Max came and rubbed against my leg. We didn't see Sir Elton the white cat, but then as we were putting the last bowl down, a grey and white cat that i had never seen came up the basement stairs. It was bizarre, not so much at first that there was another cat, but because i didn't know what to call this cat. Then i thought that maybe Sir Elton got dirty, but no. . . it was definitely supposed to be a grey and white cat. And it had a different shape to it. I patted it on the head and we were on our way. It was a nice enough cat. Maybe there was another addition to the family, but our friends failed to mention it since they just had Corbin, and he is more exciting. Could they possibly have five cats now?

Eating Healthy

I really need to stop having chips and dip. Overall, i am eating much healthier than i was . . . making sure i am getting my fruit and veggies in and definitely getting all of my water in (which if you know me, is a huge thing). However, i am eating some stuff i probably shouldn't, like potato chips and dip. I find that i am a little nauseated when i need a snack. So i am eating littler meals, but more of them. Most of the time i make a good snack choice. . . yogurt, a banana, strawberries and blueberries, orange juice. But sometimes i choose chips and dip.

Today is an absolutly gorgeous day. Tj finished power washing the back deck. What a difference! Now he is working on the front porch. We will stain next week, allowing time for the wood to dry. I am working on my thesis. I just want to be done!! I can't believe the feeling i will have when that thing is complete.

I slept so well last night. Tonight Harry Potter comes out. Tomorrow might just be a day of reading in the sun.

Thesis

My thesis is due in two weeks. Today, i am finding myself taking short cuts. . . only doing samples of lessons instead of including the full program. I want to get this done, so i can move on with my life. That means though that i am just doing what i need to get it done. . . not to be as useful in my classroom.

I want to look on-line at baby things and pregnancy forums. I want to read some of the pregnancy magazines my friend gave me. I want to scrapbook. I want to help out more around the house. By the time i finish my thesis, i will need to get going on school stuff. But, at least i had the summer to do this.

Today, i woke up at 5 with such intense pain in my abdomen. I was scared. After laying in bed and using the bathroom, i came out and slept on the couch. It hurt to stretch out so i curled up . . . and there i found the problem. Gas. Intense gas came exploding out of me, but was definitely replaced with some peace. I feel much better, now. I am a little nauseated, but still excited. I just got up from a nap, so i suppose i should get back to my thesis.