and it is October first. I have not gone to school on October first in four years, ever since my mom passed away. October first was her birthday and i would stay home to celebrate her life and cry about her passing. I know it sounds weird. It was just something i needed to do. Last year it fell on a weekend. This year, i don't have the sick days and i think i will be alright.
In previous years, i would
- Paint my toe nails (she loved having her toenails painted and always thought i should)
- Watch My So Called Life (this was our favorite show)
- Watch our wedding video (to hear her voice)
- Look through photo albums
- Take a nap
- Cry
- Blog
This year i will be surrounded by students and adults. Really no chance to cry. I do think that i will be alright. I will definitely live my day with many many memories going through my head of her. They will make me smile. Maybe i will cry when i get home. Either way, i am going to school tomorrow.
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